My mother continues to tell little lies about me. She has always been very negative and selfish. I want to know if any of you have cut ties with a parent and how did it go?

I think negative relationships with a mother and a son or daughter tend to bring out the worst in each person, I've been there. I never gave up on my daughter who is highly successful and beautiful at least physically, and married to a pretty good guy whose also successful. Her mode of revenge was to make up lies about what kind of a parent I was (for the longest time she made up lies about her brother and it broke his heart as he continued to try and connect with her). I think no I know she has told lies and made up horrific accusations of abuse that never happened and it was out of spite. My grandchildren (4 granddaughters) adored me, and she resented that yet I was often her babysitter for the whole weekend so she and her hubby could enjoy a weekend trip away...and I adored having the girls and she certainly trusted me then. When they were struggling I occasionally loaned them money which they did always pay back as agreed, but it sometimes left me "short" for the week or month...and I loaned her my car for six months with the understanding she'd at least pay the insurance so she'd have a car during the day and not felt stuck at home..but be able to take the girls to the park or go shopping herself. I am truthful by saying I am not totally innocent because I would get upset with her for responding badly to me if I was at her house for the day and she had a mountain of laundry and when the kids were down for a nap or playing it was just as easy to do it and I felt giving her and hand and taking some of the pressure off her.....her reaction was not at all the same I had when my Mom was kind enough to come and help me out as a young mom. She would be furious with me, I am assuming because I must have made her feel like she wasn't doing a good job which all I was doing was giving her and hand...I learned not to do that ever again. I loaned them a sum of money and was to get it back on Saturday and I stopped by to get it and put it back in the bank and as agreed they did pay me back but were having a BBQ with many of their professional friends...unkown to me or I would have just said I'd come by another day. As I arrived I said Oh good a BBQ, in more of a joking manner...and she told me to leave that there was not enough for me. I was shocked, mortified...at her disrespect. She eventually cut all ties with me so I could no longer see my granddaughters, and as I left her house and her telling me I could no longer see the girls I asked her to return my Kitchen Aid which she promptly refused and said "I'm not done with it"....and still has it. The girls I have since found out who are all grown up now, were told I was physically and mentally abusive to her and she could not trust me around them. Nothing could be farther from the truth, I loved my daughter and even as a single parent tried to give her the things I never had. My granddaughter 27 and married recently tried to commit suicide and that has been the first time I heard from her asking me if anyone in "our" family was bi polar, and she knew full well her deceased brother was bi polar ....I remained kind and wrote her the entire medical history of more then one bi polar person in our family so she would have full information to tell my granddaughters mental health doctors. I am absolutely terrified that her daughter like my son may end up taking her life....and I am completely at a loss for words and so unhappy that their family is having to experience this...but I have to stay out of it. Both parents are successful and can afford the best medical care and I have no doubt other then not telling them the truth about their grandmother instead making up a story that made them resent me....they will do their best to help their daughter. My daughter and her husband belong to a faith that believes in "shunning" people as their church teachings say to if their is conflict....so I have gone over 20 yrs without seeing my own child. That to me personally is not the way I would have handled it myself as a Christian, but we are of different faiths. I do know she wanted me to join the LDS church which I refused to do, shortly after that I was shunned. I have no idea why my daughter became the type to make up stories actually lies, and unfortunately I think she has actually came to believe her own lies...her brother and I both tried communication with her a number of times as he loved and missed her very much...but at some point we both realized we had no choice but to respect her wishes and cut ties with us. I have cancer now, and I have no desire to see her, not out of bitterness ..she's just not someone I know or could tolerate at this time in my life...nor can I try to show myself as a good grandmother to my four granddaughters at this late date truthfully I doubt they would trust my words or believe me. So I have had to also cut ties with a child, and its no easier then a child having to cut ties with an abusive parent...only she's an abusive daughter. I am however since she is my only survivor sending her all my family heirlooms one box at a time, they seem to mean something to her and I feel its no time for me to be bitter and just toss them out and be mean....so you see, children can disown parents for the wrong reasons also...and I have no grandparents rights in the state I live in. Sadly this seems like a very hurting world for so many families, and I wish it was not so.