She broke her hip 5 months ago, has healed but uses walker or cane.Won't do much for herself. Won't eat much, sleeps all day sometimes. Gets mad when nurses come to see her. Doesn't want them people pesting her. Will not take meds that are in daily container. Just pops a few out a bottle to take. I find some on the floor. Has an ulcer now from meds on empty stomach... Is cranky and argues with everyone. Bangs and thumps cane or walker off walls and floor. Slamming dishes, doors. Cursing and complaining most of the tine. Has diarrhea all over toilet, floor walls etc. Don't tell any1. It takes us hours to clean the mess up. Even has mess in bed and says needs bedding washed, but don't let it be done. Black and blue marks everywhere from blood thinners past year. Picks them n picks them, don't stop bleeding for hours. Last 4 weeks she'll get in her car and go. Don't tell us she's going. She should not drive, all kinds of dents and scrapes on car. Forgets where she puts stuff. Calls us by the wrong name. Gets confused and argues and argues while getting mad. I have to walk away she will not stop some times. Now she started telling lies. She started yelling that no one does anything around here. She's sick of us sleeping all the time everyday. It was 7:30 a.m. Insisted on arguing and yelling.That I walk away from her again. No sense arguing back. I left the house for a few hours so she'd calm down. She went off and came back at 8pm.
Goes back to her room.
An hour later Police knock on our door.
She called and said I hit her.
The cop asks me questions for an hour. Insisting I hit her.
Then he says I strangled her.
He says she's black and blue and has a band aid on her.
My family tells him I never touched her. They were gonna take me to jail. The 3rd time he went to talk to her, then interrogate me.
She went to Bed and turned the light off. Made me leave for the nite.
BUT now she must've called different family members.
I'm getting texts from them that I am horrible person for beating her up?? I never hit her or touch her... or even argue back... I walk away.
What am I supposed to do?
I live in the same house. I've been staying in the bedroom with my door locked cause she could call cops anytime and say I did something to her when I didn't.
I think she has Alzheimer's or dementia.
What am I supposed to do?
"Daughter inlaw Live with her
I work full time job. I Do everything I can to help when I get home or am off work"
WHY? Why do you live with her and then do "everything you can" to help when you get home or are off from work? Where is your H in all of this (HIS mother)?
Her physical needs are not being met. There are several red flags here. Do you not see them? Who takes care of her when you are at work?
Please tell us more -- how did you come to live with her, what are her finances, is Medicaid eligibility a possibility if she is poor, etc.?
Do you have someplace else to live?
Who is her Power of Attorney?
Are any of her own kids involved?
What is preventing you from leaving and letting be? If she has nurses coming in to "pester" her, she is clearly on someone's radar as a person in need of help.
MIL's behaviour could be caused by so many things, medical, emotional, pain, depression etc etc
Q1. Is this her house or yours?
Q2. How to you happen to be living together?