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My mother “SAID” that she’d been married TWICE one day at her very good residence. She hadn’t been. She HAD DEMENTIA.
People who have dementia progressively lose the ability to filter what they say.
Your MIL MAY be resistant to complying with her caregivers’ requests, but one of the reasons that she’s reading in an AL is because she NEEDS structure and consistency.
Watch the situation for both of your mothers, but quick, unsupportable (with FACTS) moves are not usually in the best interests of people with dementia.
Although these are people and differing needs / conditions must be respected. None of us would want to be compared to another person when / if we are in their shoes . . .
It is a matter of respect(ing an individual human b-e-i-n-g.
God knows, I will be totally different from my sister should we both end up with the same type / degree of dementia. We are different people, as all of us are. Yes. I wouldn't be the nice one.
May be dementia, Alzheimer's or bipolar disorder.
If there were REAL issues going on in this AL like others insist "must be" the situation, both women would have the same complaints. Which is not the case.
I would not move your mil anywhere else bc she'll bring her attitude with her wherever she goes.
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