My mother-in-law is living with us and she doesn't bathe. Any advice?

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The last time she had one was March 20 this year. She is over eating and causing falling over. She wee herself all time my house stinks and my daughter got new baby . She where's them pads up stairs for day . Never get to ourself she goes out two how's a week

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You are going to have to bathe her. It's difficult at first, but tell her that she is going to have regularly scheduled bath times. If she can wash herself, stand outside of the stall and let her do so. Offer her skin cleansing products that she likes, such as Avon or5Bed, Bath, and Beyond. Do not allow her to go without bathing because her skin can have a breakdown, and bed sores may develop. No matter where she resides (unless at her own place) she will have to bathe. Just be nice and set out her pajamas if bathing is done at night, or set out her clothes if bathing is done in the afternoon.
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Debbie, curious how your husband feels about this situation since it is his own mother? What are the medical issues with your Mom-in-law, does she have any type of dementia? Is she able to clean up her own messes?

Unless you can get this situation corrected with your Mom-in-law, or she eventually learns to wear Depends or something similar, I wouldn't want a baby crawling around on the floor.

As for bathing, many elders become afraid of falling in the tub and shower, as it becomes a scary place to easily to fall. Is the tub/shower set up with grab bars and rubber mats on the base which make the footing easier? In between times, you Mom-in-law might like using Huggies All Natural wipes... I like them for those times when I need to go someplace the last minute and don't have time for a shower.
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If your MIL is not functioning then I would find a place for her to stay where she can be cared for. Often dementia patients do not bathe or practice any hygiene measures, such as putting on clean clothes. They also may forget they have bladder incontinence and wet their panties. It sounds like you are not able to manage her in your house. I would discuss it with your husband and find somewhere she can get the care she needs.

You might discuss with her doctor, if she has one. He may be able to diagnose her with his own tests and the information you provide him about her behavior.
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Would she qualify for Medicaid? If so you might find a care facility for her. If things are really bad for her and your family call Adult Protective Services in your area. How old is she?
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