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my mother inlaw has 4 children. the youngest daughter Kim is proven unstable. Mom took her in 3 years ago, against family advice. Since then Kim has gone through most of 50,000.00, taken her doctor shopping, stolen meds and administers same drugs to control her. Mom claims she is taking good care of her but when we go regularly to help mom has not been given breathing treatments or the meds she really needs. Moms house is paid off she has SS and retirement and medicare but has no money for food or her truly prescribed meds . One daughter went to police they said they couldn't help. Mom has attempted suicide more then 3 times. what do we do?

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Kim is burned out. Time for you to go the distance and see mom is properly placed. Be sure all siblings agree with that.
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Call APS.
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A record of the suicide attempts will be key when calling in outside help, both legal and medical. What precipitated them? Who intervened? Did she receive counseling following any of the incidents? Mismanaged or stolen meds plus a history of suicide attempts should raise red flags all over the map. Hard to believe that medical personnel continue to respond to each crisis without calling for an investigation or mandating an evaluation of the patient.
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Have Kim locked up with the key thrown away; she is unfit to care for your MIL
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Adult Protective is your best option it may take several visits. Also request your MIL doctor look at ALL meds from ALL pharmacies. . They do keep records.
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Amen to everything discussed above.
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Can you tell us a little more about MIL's general condition and mental stability.
You can write to her Dr and outline what you have told us. He/She will be very interested in the misuse of the medications. They will not be able to tell you anything as that would be a HIPPA violation unless you or your hubby has POA. If Mom is of sound mind and hands over the money there is little you can do. Please come back with more info. This is often a problem with the elderly and others will have suggestions for you.
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I agree with both previous replies. Use an outside agency. Counseling with a psychotherapist who speci as lizes in aging might also be helpful. Sometimes they do home visits which wouldn't hurt as might add extra pressure on the daughter to be on good behavior.
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I would suggest getting an Elder Care attorney and a Medical Advocate or Geriatric Care Manager involved. It's hard to deal with a family situation like this without support outside the family. An outside third will take pressure off the family members and adds pressure onto the sister. Calling protective services on a family member is hard to do because of family history. An Advocate will get involved as someone who is there to help support the care related concerns and assess the needs. As they are addressing these situations they will gather information on the financial situation and the influence of the sister. Your mom will have to agree to have the help unless one of the other family members is her Durable POA but a good advocate will get her to trust them and agree. The advocate manages the care and the family dynamics pushing the sister out or trying to correct the situation and the lawyer will address any legal issues like Durable POA or involving the police and social services for abuse or neglect charges of it comes to that. Most of the time when a lawyer and a advocate / case manager becomes involved it is uncomfortable at first and there is conflict and drama but the person who is being unethical goes away or moves out.
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Get your facts straight and call adult protective services. I'm afraid, though, that if mom doesn't speak up, there's not much they can do.

She had three other children. Has your husband stepped up with his sister to confront her about these thing? The other two siblings? That's what ought to happen...
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