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Need advice my mother is going to the bathroom at least 20 times a day. Only a few times a day is she going a lot and the rest she is going hardly at all. Sometimes she is not going at all, yet she request to be taken to the bathroom. Her poop is soft and I have to wipe several times before I remove it off her butt. She complains after each wipe. She sometimes says she did not go when she did. She yells at me once she is but on the toilet to take her off to her bed. If she says on half the time, she will go and not realize it. The entire time she is yelling. Her stomach is now swollen, I think it is poop. She has a UTI and is on medicine for the third day. Now sure what to do about all these trips? Do I just let her keep yelling as once I was going to take her off the toilet and poop was coming out of her butt. I know she is not sleeping much as I am not sleeping much too. Should I give her a laxative? Will this affect the medicine that I am giving her for the UTI? Is this normal behavior for someone in the mid-stage of Alzheimer?

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Well, generally speaking I wouldn't think someone who is having a bowel movement so often would need a laxative. The antibiotic is probably upsetting her stomach. Can you call her dr and ask for advice? The swelling is worrisome. I think an enema would be better than a laxative if you were going to go in that direction. Does your mother have anything for anxiety? If you can't reach her doctor perhaps the pharmacy can help you.
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Hi Tired123 - sorry to hear about all of the issues you and your mom are experiencing - I do understand. My mom has dementia, mobility and incontinence symptoms - possibly NPH. If the UTI med doesn't help the frequent urination and your mom's primary care doctor is unsure about the cause, you should consider taking her to a urologist. Regarding the pooping / excessive wiping - have you considered a bidet? Some are super easy to install and operate and if the poops are soft, the use of a bidet will eliminate virtually all wiping. They are more sanitary and safer than just wiping with toilet paper... safer in terms of avoiding UTIs caused by a lack of proper wiping. Good luck and I hope things get better for you and your mom.
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Your description reminds me of my mother's bowel problems. You mention soft poop, but is she actually having a bowel movement? I have 3 ideas...
Sometimes there can be a partial blockage of hard feces that won't come out yet the softer poop is able to leak around this. Stool softeners or an enema may be needed.
Sometimes - like my mother - they lose the ability to expel it properly and need a stimulant type of laxative to get things moving.
Sometimes they have hemorrhoids that push on the area that makes them feel the need to go, some hemorrhoid ointment can help with that.
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CWillie reminded me of a situation with my aunt. She was nauseated, bp was going up. She wanted to stay in bed. She said she was having bms ( and maybe she was) her problem turned out to be that she was full of poop. She wasn't eating very well but she wasn't losing weight. After an exray it was clear that the problem was poop. The ER dr ordered her to have an enema and stool softeners. She was already on the softeners. Her home health nurse came the next morning and gave her an enema. We followed up with a gastro specialist who said she was to have miralax every day. If it was too much to cut the dosage back. She has been on the daily miralax ever since. The gastro dr said no stool softener needed. It has worked for her.
Also the moist wipes are easier on your mom than toilet paper.
After the enema she lost almost 5 lbs in one day.
If you don't already weigh your mom on a regular basis it can be helpful to do so on a weekly basis along with her bp.
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The swollen abdomen would worry me
When my mom was in renal failure her tummy swelled severely

Could mom be dehydrated?

Wiping the bottom over and over drives my mom crazy - says it hurts her which I'm sure it does

We've had the can never get her clean episodes too - luckily she rarely gets constipated
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