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Does anyone have an elderly parent who they live with.....and this parent constantly wants to know what they are doing.....to see if they are okay? My mother is always checking on me. I could be in the basement, in another room or in the yard.....and she is always calling me or looking for me to see if I'm okay.....so she says. What gives with this always checking on me?

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They are so dependent on you that their greatest fear is that you won't be there when they need you!
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My mother does this fairly often. She'll come in my room and ask "You okay?" with great concern. I have to check myself to see if I'm dying or something. I tell her I'm fine and ask why she asked. She'll answer she was just wondering. It is mysterious. I wonder if she might have had some fantasy that something was wrong with me.
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Oh gosh yes my mum does this! When shes in good mood I can sit in same room with her if shes moody I sit in the kitchen and smoke sometimes cry she keeps checking on me and I feel guilty then as she knows I dont want to sit with her shes only happy when im sitting there watching one of her crappy programmes "she loves hoarding buried alive" I rest my case! I tell her where im going then shell say where the hell have you been "eh having a bath?" yes this is very annoying and new to me lately gosh SOOOOOO many things to deal with this illness is cruel just awful! its terrible thing to say but im happier when my mum is just sitting watching tv then i dont have to stress about what shes up to and what mess shes making or what shes cluttering up for me to tidy away again! this i find is the most stressful for me because youre so tired at end of day and she seems to come alive then!
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My Dad did this to my Mom before he passed away from Alzheimers. It got to the point where she could not even go to the bathroom without him standing behind the door and asking if she was in there, because he was so fearful of her leaving him. So she would have to talk to him all the while doing her business! She used to go to Bingo once a week across the street from the house and would tell him and also leave a big note on the back of the door to remind him where she was. One night she came back and found him sobbing with his head down on the kitchen table because he thought she left him. You have a clear picture of how frustrating this behavior is. He basically became her 'shadow'. Fortunately, his Alzheimers progressed very quickly through the stages, and he was hospitalized within a few months, then transferred to a NH where he passed 3 days later. It was very sad of course, but I say fortunate because the insidious nature of a slow growing AD disease is what can really suck the life out of the caregiver. It gets to a point where unless you have the financial means to provide home care with paid help to give you respite, a NH might be a better option. In the meantime, maybe an anti-anxiety drug would be of some help to her and relieve you of that frustrating behavior.
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Depends. Fear of abandonment, fear you are checking or taking things from the house, etc. Its part of the paranoia and dementia disease. I don't live with my mom, however when I visit she follows me around even to the bathroom. She is constantly looking out the window to see if my car is still there, or I'm still at the house. Her fears are that I'm digging around to take things from the home, catch her "not paying bills, or not being able to care for herself"; talking about her behind her back to a neighbor or someone on the phone. I have never given her reason to distrust me (i'm the only one left in family or friends that have anything to do with her anymore) but it is part of the disease. I hate it and it is extremely frustrating and humiliating. I try to suck it up and brace myself for every visit. I keep it short; try to be as patient as possible and try not to do anything without "announcing it first" "Im going downstairs to the bathroom, I'm going outside to get the mail, I'm going into the kitchen for a glass of water...Sorry you are going thru this. Meds may help, but they aren't miracle workers. My mom was slightly better with the meds (because although they reduced anxiety, they doped her up as well) and she didn't like them so discontinued. She's 90.
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Yes mine does..Is your Mom on any anxiety meds? It may help.
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