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We have recently discovered that she is not "wet" ever. We have talked to her about it, even seen a therapist. She insists that she is wet to the point of not going out due to the problem. HELP! She is going thru over 30 pads a day and is obsessed with this "disease" as she calls it.

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She is not wet at all. We have checked..... she is dry.
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Probably what happened was at one time your Mom was wet, it went through her clothes, she was embarrassed, and she's been in fear of it happening again.

What type of pads does she wear? Are they Poise pads? Maybe the pad feels damp from stress. My gosh 30 pads a day is going way over the count. Maybe try a different brand that has a wick effect so it stays feeling dryer longer.

Sad that your Mom feels being incontinent is a "disease", it's a fact of life, no different than when she was 13 and had to start to wear Kotex. Hmmm, wonder if she did the same thing back then?
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