End of Life:: Morphine starting as needed.... is this step called "actively dying"?

Bless your heart I know this is hard... My Father passed away almost 3 years ago. I was able to be with him 24/7 for the last 3 weeks. My son who is a nurse came and we cared for him. He was very peaceful and we did give him liq

They gave it to my mother when she was dying. For two days she could still speak a little, then she fell asleep and barely came to. Another three days before she finally gave up. But she was not in pain at least. While she was still talking we asked her if she wanted to hear music. Music is so good for the aging and the hearing is the last to go. We played gospel music and Christmas music for her for the time when she was still responsive. She loved it. She was able to tell us that. Someone was with her at all times. My dad never left her side. I would go home in the evening to sleep but he slept next to her in the room. Five years later Dad had renal cell artery cancer. He only had pain for the last week of his life. By the time they started giving him morphine, he was almost gone. He lapsed into a deep sleep the first night and it took two more days after that. We gave him morphine a lot because he was drowning in his own fluids. He also died peacefully,
after only three days. I took care of both them as best I could. Dad lived with us for his last 5 years. We became best friends at the end of his life! I couldn't have asked for more!

My mother died this past May 2013 in a compassionate caring nursing facility of which she had been living for five years. Hospice brought in measures of morphine, and as a pastor myself, I watched her facial expressions and movements of her body. I was looking for any signs of discomfort. I never saw them, and I believe it had much to do with the morphine. Keep telling yourself where your loved one is going, and I also mentioned to my mother as many people as I could think of that she loved that have gone before her. I told her how much I loved her, and I gave her compliments when they surfaced. The hearing is the last to go, and I was very careful to keep her room as peaceful as possible. I did my best to not have the phone in use. I played on a CD soft instrumental music that happened to be familiar hymns sung in church. The facility where she was happened to have the CD and the player. I asked the nurses if they would mind making sure that the music played continously even when I wasn't there. The staff kept asking what they could do to help, and that is why I ended up asking if they would make sure the CD played. It played over and over, and one of the nurses when she left the room said, it is so peaceful in here. That is what I wanted. I continued to pray for the nursing facility, the nurses, my family and my Mom. Also, please note that some people do not want their loved ones in the room when they die. I don't know why that is, but if she passes away and you are not present, please do not feel guilty. The dying process is a very sacred and holy time especially for the Christian. I believe that our loved ones are going between this earth and heaven as they are dying, and what I will always remember is how my mother looked after she died. Her face was at peace. I pray that all deaths would be like this.

just lost my mother in law. its hard. I told her a few years ago I would take care of her as long as I could. I kept my promise to her.we were told she had maybe 6 months with in a week its maybe 3weeks a few days it was the week end.just keep her comfortable tell you love her and its ok youll be fine

Yes this is what they refer to as pallative care, they will do everything possible to keep her comfortable as she enters a new journey. The rattling is one of the first signs that the end is near. She will soon be at peace and heaven will have a new angel. But she will still walk beside you through out your life, just watch for signs you'll know. You're in my prayers.

I am a newbie here, but I have been where you are and I have much compassion for you. I believe actively dying is when a person takes no food or drink and is barely conscious or not conscious at all and can't communicate. Since you recognize that Hospice Care comes in as life goes out, the best that you can do is keep her comfortable. If she is unconscious, you can and should still speak to her. She may hear you. I used to wet my Dad's lips with a sponge on a stick and he responded positively to that. Pray at her bedside and speak from your heart. Persevere in the faith, and God bless you.

Yes sweetie, this is what they give someone who has very little time to live, so sorry, will keep you both in my prayers, take comfort that soon she will be an angel and be with our Lord, God Bless