Is it morally wrong in today's society for a grandson (18) to be his grandmother's personal carer? - AgingCare.com

Is it morally wrong in today's society for a grandson (18) to be his grandmother's personal carer?

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Personal carer that does bathing, toileting etc. duties.

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Let him do it. After a few months of cleaning up rotten food and filthy bathrooms, my nephew was suddenly inspired to attend college. Sometimes youth needs to see the tougher chores, flip a few fries and stand knee deep in muck before they see the value of education.
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My mother lives with my brother and his family, including 5 kids, one son. This son has grown up caring for, first, my father who was bed bound and now my mother who is going downhill quickly. I know this kid has helped do things for my mother what society would deem "not right"--but mother is very comfortable with the family and sees nothing wrong with it. My nephew is now 23 and has just finished his EMT training and is looking to nursing school. I'm sure he never felt coerced. He is a very loving, caring man.
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I must be the only one feeling a pang of discomfort with the idea. I don't worry about the grandmother as much as the healthy development of the boy. He is very young to be taking on this type of responsibility, especially if it takes up a large part of his time. He needs to be doing the things that typical boys his age do, e.g. school, career building, mate seeking. Serious caregiving is not something I would assign to any 18-year old, male or female.
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I'm a 61 year old man and I've had to provide this type care for my Mom on ocassion. We got through it but it was very uncomfortable for both of us. There's certainly no moral issue involved. If the young man is capable and both parties are comfortable there should be no problem although it is an unusual situation.
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young (handsome) male aide came to give ma a bath I was somewhat taken aback but soon got used to the concept. The hospital made him cover his arms because he had been a marine and he was covered in tattoos The powers that be though it might frighten the patients. If they had asked me I could have told them not nearly as much as having him come to give an elderly woman a bath.
I agree some people might be very uptight with the concept and sentencing this grandson to providing care long term is not fair but not more unfair that than asking a grand daughter of the same age to give up her life.
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I think there would be something morally wrong with expecting or demanding an 18-year old to take on this kind of task. If he chooses to do it, I think it's fine, as long as he has the opportunity to exit if he wants to.
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Whoever ends up marrying that 18 year old grandson is a lucky lucky person. He must be very compassionate, caring and kind.

I see no issue, in fact it makes me smile.

Angel
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My question would be for how long would this grandson be his grandmother's caregiver? Doing the math, grandmother could be as young as in her mid 50's. Would he be helping her for the next 20+ years? If so, that would be so very unfair to him.

Is this grandson being paid? I would hate to see him in his late 20's without a dime to his name because he wasn't employed getting a salary and numerous benefits.
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There's a story here. If you give us more details about the situation, you'll get better responses. It matters if the parties are comfortable with the situation.
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Oh, dear. It sounds like someone needs to provide the young man with some guidance. He sounds like a failure the launch case in the making. Since she is 80 years old, I wonder what will happen to him when she is gone. I guess a situation like this has to be taken one day at a time.
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