How do I "morally" give my mom a prescribed anxiety/depression medication w/out her knowledge?

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She needs it but refuses to take it. I am guilt ridden over giving my mom a prescribed anxiety/depression medication because she doesn't want to take it. However, she desperately needs it. She has had two small strokes and her meds have to be crushed and mixed with food (pudding) in order for her to swallow them. She has a lot of anxiety and is in the early stages of depression. This medication is prescribed but she will refuse to take it. I am overwhelmed with feelings of betrayal.

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Chauna - you want what's best for your mother, right? Well, the doctor said it's best that your mother have this medicine to help calm her and hopefully have a better life. And your mom has dementia - so she cannot rationalize clearly - which is why you're having to be her caregiver. Unless you don't agree or trust the doctor, please don't feel guilty about doing your job well. It's hard enough being a caregiver on it's own - just do what you know is right. Because unfortunately - the roles have reversed and now you're the parent and she's the child. Good luck!!
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You probably won't agree with my answer and that is ok. I am sure you will get other suggestions. My mother has dementia, she is out of control with family members but very nice, sweet to outsiders. I tell her what we call "loving lies" the medication is for something other than what it is really for. I tell her she has to take this because the dr. is concerned about blah blah blah. If she questions me a week later I tell her the same thing. If you have to crush the pills up just make sure with the dr. that the medication has the same effect crushed because it makes a difference. If she is willing to eat food with the pills crushed...why tell her she is taking additional meds?
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Girl...you just gotta do what ya gotta do! If the Dr.says she needs it, then just give her her pudding and everybody is happy. IMO, It is not immoral to take the best care of your Mom without her having to know about, and fight about, everything you need to do. You are doing a great job! Throw the guilt away!
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