Mom is stage 2 cancer. She has a small tumor in her rectum that she is getting radiation and chemo treatment for. They want to operate on her and the doctors said she will be cancer free, however she will need to wear a colostomy bag. She refuses to ever wear a bag. Our grandfather committed suicide because he had one and felt humiliated. But I assured her that even with my friend who has it (she's in her 40's) --- she lives a very productive and fulfilling life. It's not debilitating in the least. She still refuses. She'd rather let the cancer grow. I know it's not "my" choice - but I'm sad over her unwillingness to be cancer free. Are there any respectful steps I can take to convince her otherwise? If she doesn't get this operation after the radiation and chemo shrinks the tumor, she won't live long.