My 75 year old mom (who lives on her own, about 6 hours away from me) has vivid and detailed auditory & visual hallucinations (mainly auditory). She is otherwise relatively ok (memory is decent, cooks, cleans, etc). When she experiences a stressful hallucination (for example my aunt and uncle in the house trying to get her to sign papers to sell the house or my cousin is threatening to kidnap her cat), I try to calm her down and then lead the conversation in a different direction, which generally works well. (note: the relatives live in Europe and are not visiting her. Also, fyi, she hasn't been diagnosed with anything as she refuses to go to the doctor - she hates doctors and medicine. She's not on any drugs and is physically very healthy).
One my last visit to see her a few weeks ago, I went up a few days before my fiancée so I could spend more time there. I slept in the guest room. On the day my fiancée was to arrive she suddenly told me that we couldn't sleep in the guest room because that is where Bob and Eric sleep and really it was Bob's room. Eric is my 10 year old second cousin and it seems Bob is her friend (sometimes called her husband) who is a nice, friendly guy and helps protect her from the mean relatives who harass her. Bob is completely made up - there is no real life equivalent of Bob (but at least he's a happy hallucinations - a friend). My mom said we (my fiancée and I) could either sleep on the floor in the livingroom on a mattress or in the basement spare room. We have slept in the livingroom before but stopped because sleeping on the floor hurts our backs. The basement is probably about 10oC (50oF) and we have no desire to sleep there. I suggested to her why don't Bob & Eric sleep in the basement and she said no, the guest room was their room. She got increasingly angry and insistent that we couldn't sleep in the guest room. I tried to explain why it was important that we sleep in a good bed but she wouldn't hear any of it. Each time I tried to give her alternatives for her "guests" she just kept saying no. She told me I was selfish. I decided I did not want to ask my fiancée to sleep on the floor or in the basement, so we ended up not staying there (a friend came and got me) and our trip was cut short (my fiancée knows all about her hallucinations). This was the first time her hallucinations have impacted a visit like this.
We are now planning on going to visit her over Canadian Thanksgiving (first weekend in October). I have no idea if she'll once again say we can't sleep in the guest room. If she does say that, I don't know how I should be handling the situation. Should I go along with her delusion/hallucinations and sleep either on the floor or in the basement??? I am not keen on this, as while I'm ok with going along with some of her hallucinations, I also feel like I have limits on how far I'm willing to take this. Or should I just go along with it to keep the peace? I'm an only child and I don't want to make the situation worse. Any advice would be appreciated.