Mom's dying and I'm scared of how I'll be able to go on without her. Any advice?

I feel like there should be a hotline for people going through this. The circle of life can be really tough and unbearably sad. When I was losing my grandma, the entire family was out of town. It was just me, my grandma, and the staff at the nursing home. She went into some sort of seizure, I still don't know what it was. Oh it was so awful to witness. I think I was a little bit in shock. I remember afterward, an aid, sensing my distress, gave me the biggest, strongest hug I've ever had in my life. This total stranger made such a difference in my life. I am sending you a big, strong virtual hug.

Liverlips, so sorry to read about your Mother. This is a difficult time, and it's not easy for most of us to witness this part of the journey.

Try to look at it this way.... you'll manage to be able to go on without Mom the same way your Mom did when her own Mother had passed, and her Mother's mother had passed.

Once everything settles down, hold your head up high, go out and get that new job, and make your Mom proud once again. In a way, you won't be alone, Mom's spirit will be there for you.

My Dad's spirit will show up in the house when I noticed something had been moved just a tiny bit, just enough that I know about. One day my late parent's old chime mantel clock chimed once, strange since it hadn't chimes in years. One day when opening the front drapes which are on rings, I felt a hand on top of my hand helping me, and it didn't scare me. Thanks, Dad.

When I found myself with a lot of free time, I dove into the family history which I found very fascinating. I had signed up for Ancestry.com. Lot of very interesting great great uncles and aunts. For example, a female relative who had her degree in chemistry back in the very early 1900's, school teaching was her only career choice.... yet, her brother who also had a degree in chemistry had a high level job in a corporation.

I felt that way when I thought about losing my dad. However, I did the complete opposite and pulled everything together and handled business. I guess I just did what I had to do & knew my dad would have been proud of me. I now just lost my mom and have continued to manage everything on my own. You find strength you never knew you had. They would want us to move forward. It doesn’t mean forgetting them, it means living our lives knowing they are watching over us.

Thanks for your encouragement, everyone.

You'll be able to go forward like your mother was able to live on after her mother died. I do hope that you have some other family members and friends who can be with you at this difficult time.

Do you have anyone who can come and sit with you for a short time? In my mom's final day, even though I had hospice, it was just me. I had a girlfriend come and she spent a couple of hours just sitting with me and talking about mom. It gave me great comfort and I will never forget that kindness of hers. She had only met my mom once but wanted to support me. My mom died later that evening when I was in the room right next to her. I had been with her for 12 hours, going in and out and she died when I was in the next room taking a break. So if that happens to you, don't be surprised. Our loved ones sometimes want to be alone when they pass. You'll get through it. Freqflyer's comments were beautiful about the circle of life and your mom and her mom and on back through your family line. {{{Hugs}}} we're here with you during this time.

My mother died this morning. I woke up and found that she'd already passed. I was alone in the house with her at the time, so I had a brief moment of hysteria, and then I just cried my eyes out. I crawled into bed with her to hold her one last time. She was never a "touchy-feely" person, so I was finally able to do that. Family members came to sit with me afterward for several hours, until the funeral home came to get mom. I preferred not to watch her being taken out in a body bag, so I just looked out at the horizon through my kitchen window, until after they drove off. Its going to be the hardest thing to get over, I know, but I'm going to have to keep putting one foot in front of the other every day, whether I want to or not. I have the freedom to leave the house now for long periods, which will be nice. I can only take about two weeks off from work. Going back will be tough. But anyway, the best advice I've been given is to take one day at a time, or one moment at a time. I still can't go into her empty bedroom, yet, though. Dear God, help me get through this biggest challenge of my life.....

We're here for liverlips! {hug} If you're having trouble being alone with your mother at this very difficult time, can you have a hospice volunteer or counselor with you? I'd hate to think you're afraid of being alone during this time. Do you have family to lean on and who can come? I wish I had more for you, though posters above gave you good ideas. {big hug to you}

Liverelips, oh, I just remembered, Hospice usually has a support hotline. Plus Hospice will call a few times after the fact to see if you need to talk to anyone.

Its nice to know that people understand. Thanks