What to do when Mom won't go to a doctor? - AgingCare.com

What to do when Mom won't go to a doctor?

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For the past three years, my mom has been steadily deteriorating with dementia. She has hallucinations, is aggressive toward my Dad and sometimes her children. She is 86 years old, and very strong. Last week, she knocked my Dad into a wall. At night she has episodes where she does not recognize my Dad and orders him out of "her" home. My Dad is 88 and very frail. Mom refuses to go to a doctor or even take vitamins. How can we get a diagnoses?

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I second that emotion. She is well beyond the point of being capable of making her own health care decisions. Sorry this is happening to you. Be aware that if you are responsible for a vulnerable elder's care and you allow another person to hurt them when they cannot effectively defend themselves, that could be judged by adult protective services as "failure to protect." You could try calling Area Agency on Aging or Adult Protective Services yourself for additional help with this.
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Call 911 and have her transported to the ER next time she hits someone. If they refuse transport, have them call the cops. She needs an involuntary psychiatric admission. And no, I'm not kidding.

She could attack a small child in the neighborhood. She could cause your frail dad serious, possibly fatal injury. Don't take any chances.
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