I'm at my wit's end trying to understand this. About eight months after poppy died, the isolation of living alone got to mom and she started worrying about everything and hyperfocusing on things until she was convinced she was going blind or losing her mind, etc.. I think that may be when she kinda stopped eating so much. She went from 92 down to 84. Sis and I were considering having a caregiver come, or else trying to talk her into an ILF.
Before we could do that, she had a small stroke and went to the SNF for rehab. Wow! Our painfully shy mother became a social butterfly. She ate in the common dining room, where four to six people would sit a table. She particpated in activities. So when she got discharged, we put her in an independent living facility, and eagerly awaited the start of her new life, after seeing her transform in the SNF.
Well, she hates it. She will not leave her room AT ALL, unless one of her kids is there. When we're there with her, we'll go down to the dining room, and she'll eat everything on her plate. We'll go to Bingo, and she has fun. But she has her own kitchen. She couldn't even call down and have food sent up, because she'd never done it before and didn't want to look stupid, so she began making food in her kitchen.
We decided after about 10 days there that it's just not working out and we might as well move her back home and have a companion come in five days a week. My sister and I haven't been able to visit her for the past three days, because we are trying to get the house ready for her, and sure enough she's not eating enough because we aren't there to eat with her.
This morning, I really started to get quite mad inside because my sister and I for the past six weeks have been all about mom 24/7 and we are working so hard to get her back home so she can be happy, and now she won't even take care of herself properly.
I thought, I'm gonna post here and see if anyone has any opinions on why she won't eat when she is alone, but eats very well when one of us is with her. Is it just the fact that eating alone is not as stimulating as eating with someone? I get that. Or is she playing some weird attention game? If I could at least understand it, maybe I wouldn't be so mad.