Mom's on Hospice and wasn't eating just drinking, but now wants to eat, is this normal? - AgingCare.com

Mom's on Hospice and wasn't eating just drinking, but now wants to eat, is this normal?

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End of life for mom, on hospice, wasn't eating just drinking, and now she wants to eat, we thought this was the end for her, she has had problems fell twice within 4 years, infections, c-diff and blood clotting in her leg, she has parkinsons, the stiffening kind, sleeps alot, she is so thin, she has been like this for a month now, but now she is talking better, she could barely talk a month ago, does this mean she will get better I'm sure her body is shutting down. I just don't want to see my mom live like this just in bed sleeping alot and getting thinner and thinner, unless now she wants to eat more, has anybody gone through this? It's like a roller coaster

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Thank you Windyridge!
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Sarah, bless you. You are doing all the right things for your Mom. I hope when I reach the end I have some one like you caring for me.
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Thank you so much for your reply, no I am not working, and mom is only a few miles away at a retirement home, they take wonderful care of her, and I visit her everyday!
I quess this is the process, some days she is more alert then other days, day by day
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Toward the end of her life, mom would go days without eating and then say she was hungry. I would fix her something easy to eat only to have it sit there. When I would ask if she was no longer hungry, she would say - 'I ate some of it'. The feeling either passed and she didn't want to say that - or forgot.. either way... it's a normal process of the end times. I don't know if you are still working, but when her breathing pattern changes (sometimes referred to as Cheyne-Stokes breathing) you may want to take some time off under the 'family leave act' so that you will be able to be close at hand. My mother passed away approximately 21 days after she stopped eating.
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Sarahbells my prayers and good thoughts go to you and family. It sounds like the end is near, but you fortunately you are able to communicate and express all the love you feel for her. I know this will happen eventually with my mother (100 years old) and I have a hard time even thinking about how difficult this must be, sitting by the bed, waiting, grieving. Hugs and good thoughts to you
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Thank you so much for these answers! It really helps! It is a struggle and goes day by day, yesterday the caretaker at her home said that her feet are pointed now which means she wouldn't be able to stand anymore, seems like slowly her body is shutting down, could take months before she passes, is this one of the signs? I hope and pray god takes her peacefully in her sleep, seems like this week she is more alert, sleeps alot, but seems to answer us when ever she is awake, thanks again everyone I really appreciate the feedback, helps tremendously!
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Sarah just continue to love her and get her anything she can safely eat. Spend as much time as possible but do not consider trying to bring her home. She is settled where she is living. is she asking to come to your house specifically or is she just saying she wants to go home. Many people at the end of life will say they want to go home but what they actually mean is that they want to go to their eternal home. As others have said a rally in the last few days happens a lot. Enjoy each day as it comes.
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Sarabells,

I just went through this with my mother. She craved a strawberry milkshake and a rootbeer float I was able to get her the milkshake. She took about three long sips of it.

She fought passing for a week, then begged for it. Finally, they started giving her morphine. But even then, it took five days for her to pass. My mother begged me to come home, but I just could not take care of her. She needed help with everything at 97. Mother went peacefully on June 19th, and I am still tying up lose ends regarding her tiny estate.

You stated exactly what I felt. Your mother's time is near, and soon you will start your new journey.
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Thank you for these answers! I feel so bad for my mom, she's starting to say she wants to come to my ho9use (she lives in a retirement home and they take wonderful care of her!) but it would be so hard to transport her and hard to take her to the bathroom because she is so weak, this is what stresses me, because I love her so much and want to do everything I can for her, but this right now is impossible. Some days I just wish god would take her so she can be in peace, but I know only he knows when it is her time, it's so hard and stressful to see her like this, I visit her everyday, so when I see her wanting to eat and seeing her a little more alert it scares me to think she can be like this lingering on for a long time! I want her to be at peace and for me to go onto living the rest of my life . .
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There can be up days and down days. Toward the very end of life, there is a phenomenon called surging thought to be caused by a spike in serotonin. Someone may feel like eating and talking and seem like they are getting better. Then within a day or so, they go in to the active dying process.

My father surged at the hospital about mid-day on the day that he died. He had been eating very little. At lunchtime he ate all of a big turkey sandwich, then lay back. His breathing became very congested. I thought he might be choking on some of the turkey. It wasn't that. It was a death rattle as his lungs were filling with fluid. He died about an hour later. I like to think that the turkey sandwich and Ensure he had for lunch was his way of enjoying a final taste of the good things on earth before it was time for him to leave.
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