Mom was caretaker for husband with lung cancer and and bipolar son, now at 80 she needs help with rectocele. How can I help? - AgingCare.com

Mom was caretaker for husband with lung cancer and and bipolar son, now at 80 she needs help with rectocele. How can I help?

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Now newly diagnosis of anxiety and depression. She has always been independent
(. see note on difficult situations) Doctors sent her home with meds. and says she needs family member to make sure take meds should be okay at home.

how do I handle the situation to give her the respect and dignity she definitetly deservers. She also had double masectomy while being caretaker for husband and son.

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You are not alone at all with your financial situation. You can do everything right, but when all the jobs go away, you're just screwed. They say we all have to become entrepreneurs. When I was getting educated, they wanted nice obedient worker bees! I'm glad I'm retired - no pension, but a bit of a nest egg. My daughter is 22, and I HOPE she is going to be adapted to this scary new world!

How far away does your mother live? Is there a senior center or church near her? You might be able to get a nice friendly volunteer to visit her. It's sometimes loneliness as much as depression that gets a person down. Give me some more details about her problems and behavior. What worries you the most? Other than her independence (stubbornness?) do you get along well with her? Some of us here have great mothers, but for many others, the relationship is complicated.
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My Mother is still living at her home with my bi-polar brother. She has had a hard life all her life. My brother and mom help each other. But the strain is
heavy for them both. Not much available in area for help when it comes down to it. Especially if you have saved all your life and done without . The rectocele
was the most recent of major health issues. Dealing with all these different specialist has been draining to the point of giving up. The expense with no results or relief. Doctors seem to want to pass you on to the next specialist. And dealing with mental health it seems like you become a third class citizen . My husband has a new saying they don't call it practice for nothing. My mother seems to be the one they are practising on. I have my 33 yr. old daughter living at home with no job and 3 degrees. And my husband lost his career 4 years ago, working part time temporary after 40 yrs. and 10 yrs. of college.. No unemployment for either and all money and savings going to pay for our own insurance. I live in1050 sq. feet so pretty cramped already. REally getting hit hard with this economy we might end up all living in a box. WE all have college
degrees but you might as well use it to wipe our???? I planned for a rainy day not a typhoon.
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Does she live with you? I don't know about her, but my husband definitely needs close supervision to be sure he takes his pills morning and night. She has had a hard life recently, hasn't she?

With the rectocele, is it painful, or is the main issue hygiene? I'm a fan of the hand-held shower hose, and a walk-in shower rather than a tub.

God bless you both.
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