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My 2 cents. If your Mom was a child during the depression, then she was no more than middle age during the conspicuous consumption times of the 60"s. They are almost exact opposite times. There was also a war-time where things were rationed. All this contributed to confusion about being a good steward of material things. Then recycling and repurposing further complicates the problem.
How much is too much? I agree that 100's of margarine tubs is too much, especially if they aren't used for anything.
My point is just don't be too hard on her. There will be plenty of time later to take care of the "too many" things.
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The hiding things can be a form of paranoia or dementia. Not so bad that she saves reusable things- its the hiding.
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My Mom saved plastic bags. When we finally moved mom to assisted living, we found them hidden in every possible place throughout the house. She also hid money... found over $2000 hidden in the most unusual of places. Her home was always immaculately kept. It was more like a museum instead of a home. But she took great pride in it. When she stopped cleaning it, it was one of the first signs to us as kids that there was a problem.
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Years ago I knew an old woman who would grew up in Iowa during the depression. She washed and saved every tin can, and offered her cache to me when she moved.

Your mom's house is neat and you can walk through it without running into piles of junk so she must not be a hoarder. Hoarding's not curable anyways so you're in luck.
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This could be my MIL with the plastic containers.They are in several places in the kitchen, and now she has them in her sun porch as well. Hubby opened a cupboard, and plastic containers came raining down on his head! MIL is going to be 88 this year and was a child during the depression, and everything seems valuable to her. My FIL was this way too, saving every little thing for his workshop in the basement. Sometimes we sneak a few into the recycle each week and she has not noticed them disappearing this way...
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cdnreader—I too love the look and simple angles of minimalism, I’d love to move toward that. It was the neat tidy stacks of you name it in my house I grew up in and my parents always kept their salvage very neat and organized. But it spoils the lines and surfaces of minimalism.

I’ve never gotten close to recreating my fantasy, my house is a replica of my parents.
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Dear Nana,

My grandmother and both my parents were savers. My mother can repurpose almost everything. Every bag, container, jar was saved. It was hard for me because I'm more of a minimalist. But growing up poor my mother just knew you had to keep what you have. There was no one around to give you anything.

My parents found it very hurtful and painful when I tried to help "clean" up. They thought I was being disrespectful and wasteful. As long as the house is safe and things have a proper place, I would try and let them have their way.
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Yes, of course that memory effects your mom’s behavior. Growing up my mom would mend potholders to extend their use.

Get your mom’s mental condition checked though. My mom’s dementia showed itself by her hiding every important paper in the house. And her bedroom headquarters in the house was stocked like a bomb shelter!

Call a geriatric mental health department at a local hospital and have your mom evaluated, if you hadn’t already.

Growing up I saw how Depression folks can stretch a dime.
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Those little plastic containers at the grocery are expensive! I would ask mom if I can borrow from her stash because I’m making soup (stew, chili, spaghetti sauce, etc.) and “if I have to buy all those little plastic storage boxes, I might as well buy the food off the shelf!” Then you can either actually make the stuff and freeze it (and bring Mom some, of course) or throw them out once you get home.
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Haha, FreqFlyer, I had to laugh at your post. My mom had her box boutique and I inherited a small piece of that. I took my recycling to our big city bins yesterday and there was a perfectly good paper box with a lid (for reams of paper). SCORE - I felt a small thrill when I saw it! Those are good boxes - just the perfect size! I have it in my trunk. I'm in the process of moving, so I have a good reason, but I definitely inherited the "a good box should never go to waste" gene from my mom. So you are not alone. :) Oh, and I use my straws over and over again, like SueC's dad.
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If my boss starts going out the office door to throw away a box in the dumpster I will tackle him. I cannot toss away a "good box". I use to flatten out the boxes, pull off the tapes and labels, and save them in the basement. Said flatten box was good under the car to catch any fluid drips.

Many a time my boss would ask me if I had a small box as he wanted to send some small toys to his great-grandkids.... yep, I have the perfect box for him :) He finally stopped teasing me of being the "keeper of the boxes".

Thank goodness for weekly recycling at the curb. I can put the boxes out and not feel terrible. I do think twice whenever I get a Chewy pet food box, gosh those boxes are thick, too good to recycle at the curb :P
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Absolutely it’s because they grew up in the Great Depression!
My mom never threw any food away. She thought there was a purpose for everything and that everything could be recycled.
Humor her. Throw those things out in a few weeks- she won’t remember.
She isn’t going to change I suggest adapting yourself to it. Choose your battles. Let this go.
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Ah this brings back loads of memories for me too.

I think I am a little bit of a 'hoarder' BUT I could tell you exactly what each of the items I have 'rescued' can be reused for. :)

We also save good paper bags, you can grease them up and cover the chicken or meat, in the oven. (no grease proof paper)

Large ish jars or bottles, can have the tops cut of (with a grinder - then rounded for little vases)

Small ones are good for sorting coloured buttons, hooks and eyes, screws etc

Never buy a plant pot, chipped cups and bowls do this well.

Old wellington boots (gumboots) can repair soles on shoes.

Soooooo many things.
As I expect you can guess, we grew up with nothing, then rationing so everything had a value.

I feeel for you but I do understand how it happens.
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In further defense of our depression era parents.

There must be dozens of different categories to divide hoarders into. It’s another “spectrum” to consider.

I’m sure people who collect Jimmy Choo shoes don’t consider themselves hoarders. Go back and read the Mayo definition. It’s a tricky one. One mans treasure another mans trash etc.

My mother born in 1918, (100 this May) spent her money on land but anything that crossed her threshold was not likely to exit.

I could list examples that would go on and on and I saw her many times provide others with just the thing they needed to solve a problem.

As the person who inherited her home and her eye for possibilities I sometimes think there should be a game show (at least a board game) for naming all the possibilities for any random item that most of us would toss.

So I’m going to say that there are many reasons to keep items that you perceive as worthless. I’m sorry you don’t have the life experiences (thankfully-possibly) that taught you the benefit of a plastic container.

At what point do you decide the exact number of any given item is the right number? ( actually I do decide on a magic number for things that seem to be growing).

At what date do you give up on the idea that you will make that quilt you’ve been saving the scraps for? Well...I guess you would have had to be a fabric person. Don’t go there if you haven’t already.

My husband says we have to move if I collect anymore books. (These are exempt IMO).
He wants to take a road trip this weekend to an outlet mall to buy pots! I’m betting he will not recycle one of the many pots in our cupboards. Can you tell who cooks at our house? But with all my books I can’t complain. Lol

If your mom’s items are hidden, I’d say she’s done a good job on managing any hoarder inclination she might have been burdened with.

In one of my in laws kitchen drawers I found many neatly folded white prescription paper bags. I never remember an occasion when one of those bags were used for anything?? But they were perfectly good bags??? I get it.
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you said it Garden
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Oh Nana,
What memories you've conjured up. My dad was the king of saving "stuff", from styrofoam containers to used drinking straws.

He used to go "dumpster diving" and bring home "treasures". Old, broken junk that didn't mean anything to anyone but him. It was "still good" and he could always "use" something off of it.
He would tear things apart to "fix" them then never put them back together, piles of disassembled stuff all over his apartment.

When he had to leave his apartment to go to live in a board and care, I must have thrown away over 100 disposable containers, out of ink pens, etc. (out of his sight, of course!)

I never remember throwing out "the trash" because nothing was (trash), even old broken belts, holey underwear, faded shirts, everything needed to be saved and had some "purpose".

He picked up paper clips, safety pins or any other intact object off the sidewalk. That used to make me mad because you don't know what kind of germs they have. He wasn't a bit concerned.

Fortunately, I can get rid of things (lots of donations to the Goodwill and other charities). But I also shop there, so what I donate, I probably buy enough to take its place! LOL. It must be the genes.
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Ummm, my kids make fun of me for everything that I save. And I mean just about everything. I just never had so much growing up, and even as a young adult. I learned how to be frugal about as early as I could talk. Now what I do with lots of the stuff that I can't reuse myself or drop off at the recycling bin (only when I'm going that way anyway), I drop off at the local pre-school. They love all those toilet paper & paper towel rolls, egg cartons, and other assorted containers. They're wonderful for crafts for the kiddos. (Of course, it's a good idea to check with them before you start saving just for them.)
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GardenArtist, my parent were the same way as yours were. I had forgotten that my Dad had remodeled the kitchen and the 1 bathroom we had in the house where I grew up, remodeled twice, until you had mentioned it. He also had me watching "This Old House".

Then I look in my own basement to see extra wallboard and pieces of lumber sitting around. The other day I found an extension board for a dining room table.... but heaven knows what table it is related to, table is probably long gone, but the wood is too good to just toss out :P

I did find when I cleared out my parents house that my Dad had a ton of pill bottle tops. Had no idea why he kept those tops. Only thing I could think was those tops were "trophies" that he was able to actually get those darn tops off the bottles !!

Dad did use many old plastic medicine bottles in his workshop to store nails, bolts, screws, etc.

My Mom had a knack of making clothing last for many decades. I even found a winter jacket that was mine from high school back in the 1960's. It looked almost brand new. And yes she would wear it every winter.

Nana1nana2, my Mom use to wrap the frozen foods in plastic bags, even the ice cream. Also would wrap in a plastic bag bags of uncooked rice and flour, which I think she did to keep bugs out.
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There is a point when saving something to reuse becomes hoarding. My father tipped that scale years ago. It is a sickness and it does not have to look like the hoarding shows on TV.

Dad has compulsions to 'save' things, but they do not get reused, nor recycled. Dad travels on Ferries regularly and saves every single plastic utensil that he gets. We are talking over 30 years of 'saving'. He fills a drawer, then empties the drawer into a plastic bag, then eventually they wind up in a garbage pile outside. One day I must have picked up 1000 assorted plastic utensils. I am not stretching the truth.

Keeping a few yoghurt containers to plant tomatoes in them is one thing, keeping hundreds is another. I have a little gizmo to make seedling pots out of newspaper. No need to keep plastic around, when it can go in the recycling.
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CWilie makes a good point. All those margarine tubs could be hosts to dozens of little seedlings, especially ones like cucurbits that spread as they grow. It's a lot cheaper to reuse them that way than buy new Jiffy 7's each year, unless of course you have your own peat bog and make your own Jiffy pots.

Foam carryout containers can also be used for growing seeds, and what better way to use them than to help provide your own food?
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My experience is similar to Blannie's. My parents saved things, and I do too if I can reuse them or can't recycle them.

We also learned a very useful ethic in using and reusing what we could. While this ethic is laughed at or ridiculed by some these days, we had our own method of recycling long before it became standard, or even mandatory in some areas.

We made out own clothes, grew much of our food, kept cars until they were on their last legs, and Dad built all the cabinets in the kitchen, remodeled it as well as the bath, and built a beautiful butcher block set of counters and cabinets that Norm Abrams would admire. He saved thousands of dollars, which eventually became available for his use during his last days.

There's a big difference between hoarding and saving for reuse. I'm appalled at how easily things are discarded these days, with the attitude - "you can buy it cheaper". And unfortunately, we can, given the junk that's commonly available.

I think there's a happy medium between hoarding, recycling and considering the wasteful discards of items. And I think there's an art to using how to repurpose items.

I think people who had to stand in bread lines or heat up bricks to put in beds to keep them warm at night view saving much differently from those who have the latest in electric gadgets.

And since i'm on a rant, I can't believe that people waste money on Alexa and other talking machines. How much effort does it take to look up weather either online, or by studying clouds and the kinds of trees with leaves that turn upward in a storm? What do these people do all day when there are speaking machines to tell them literally everything? What real choices do they have to make?
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According to the Mayo Clinic the clinical definition of hoarding is:
"Hoarding disorder is a persistent difficulty discarding or parting with possessions because of a perceived need to save them. A person with hoarding disorder experiences distress at the thought of getting rid of the items. Excessive accumulation of items, regardless of actual value, occurs."

People who save things that are useful and have actual value are different from your mother, who sounds like she is saving and hiding things that actually are garbage or recycling.

How old is your mother? Has her behavior changed lately? Does she have a social circle or is she along most of the time? Have you considered finding a support group for her for her hearing loss?
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There's a difference between being frugal and hoarding, a frugal person can recognize that all those margarine tubs saved since 1960 can easily be replaced whereas a hoarder will cling to them as if they are too valuable to throw away.
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My mom (born in 1919) had what I called her "box boutique". She saved every box she got, from empty candy boxes to any kind of shipping box, "in case she needed it". She could have opened her own UPS or Fedex store, LOL She'd also buy toilet bowl cleaner on sale and when they moved from their house into a senior facility, there must have been 20 bottles of cleaner. Mom saved everything. Old wrapping paper, string, you name it, she saved it. It was definitely from growing up in the Depression and growing up poor on a farm. But she and my dad (who was similar but not quite as bad) taught my brother and me to be frugal, which has stood us both in good stead.
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Hahaha, read this and smiled. When we started cleaning out my mothers house, we found all kinds of random "saved" garbage. There must have been 30 chinese takeout boxes that she cleaned out, stacked and saved. We laughed wondering how long it took to save that many.
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Sounds more like hording to me.
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