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File in the department of "it's always something."


My mom has been in diapers since her stroke last May. She hasn't complained about them being uncomfortable at all, until recently. She is constantly bothered by them, especially when she's sitting up, which means she doesn't want to go out anymore. We've tried different brands, sizes, and styles. She does not have bedsores. She can't walk and she is incontinent in both ways, so she really cannot be without a diaper for very long. Her aide and I are not sure what to do and what has changed!

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Perhaps mom just needs a really good cushion on her wheelchair. I think I would be uncomfortable sitting on the padding in the briefs! Just a thought...
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Use Desitin in place of powder. Works wonders. 40% zinc oxide diaper rash ointment.
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What does her doctor say? See if the doctor has a suggestion....with dignity, of course.
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Sorry, I would not use baby powder in diapers. I wouldn't use it where there are creases. It tends to clump when moisture hits it and can cause irritation. Cornstarch maybe better.
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Hi xinabess,
My Mother Had to wear a diaper 24-7 and we found that putting a kotex pad onto the back of the diaper where the elastic is stopped the elastic cutting into her back and waist and she was much more comfortable.I sure hope you find something that works for you all soon.Take care! Lu
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Just a thought: She may have lower back pain from a nerve compressing the spine disc or have very tight hamstrings from lack of mobility. It's like when we sit at the desk all day long, our lower back and thighs will eventually start to hurt. That's why there's such a push to do yoga and Pilates as we age to keep all muscles flexible.
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My mom loved her Miracle Bamboo cushion for her wheelchair. It really relieved the pressure sore she had on her tailbone. Just a thought.
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Thank you everyone. I so appreciate the input. Fortunately, I don't have to go "south" just yet!! She has an aide 24/7 and has had nurses visiting this week (to assess for Medicaid, etc) and have checked her out from head to toe. No sores, no infections. She was OK today in the diapers (which she calls "tighty whities"). She still refuses to sit in the wheelchair because she says her butt hurts. It could be just muscle/bone soreness. I don't know. She has started a very low dose of an antidepressant. Hopefully that will help with her sudden refusal to sit in the wheelchair ever.
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Do you have a pen light or a mini-light that you can use to look at her private area and see any irritation or discoloration? As caregivers, we sometimes have to play nurse and doctor so if can, take a look "down there". If nothing unusual is on the skin itself, then do you see any creamy or a light white goo coming out of her private area? This is a classic sign of a vaginal infection. Even if you don't see something, you should still let her doctor to know what's going on. You may need to change diaper brands. Not all diapers are made the same and your mother's skin could be reacting a chemical in the diaper's lining. I use Abnea because they're hypoallergenic. They're expensive but worth it if you can afford them. I buy them off of Amazon. My mother is immobile permanently from the side effect of vascular dementia so she's in diapers. She's lost her verbal skills and will squirm to let me know she's uncomfortable and that something is not right. Unfortunately, being confined to diapers no matter how often you change them and just overall skin and immunity health decline as part of the aging process, the elderly are very susceptible to infections "down South". Also ask the doctor if you can and what can you apply to your mother's skin "down there" if she's reacting to the chemicals in the diaper lining. That area needs to be kept as dry as possible to avoid getting a skin infection so I wouldn't apply any cream or lotion until you get an okay from the doctor.
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Could you use cloth pads. I make my own (urinary leakage) and wash as needed. You could wash or throw away the dirty ones.
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Upon advice from my dad [dr/surgeon], we have been using a cream that is Rx for hemrhoids for all issues [cuts, sores, burns, insect bites] including diaper rash but then we use a silicone barrier cream over it - ask dr for a Rx as it has a local anesthetic that sooths too

Your mom may find the bulkiness is part of problem just watch the difference how a 2 year old walks with & without diapers on - if you could get her to verbalize what it is that bothers her then you might be able to go forward - however you may need to do some prompting - good luck
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cwillie has some incredible insight - you can have your mother checked for a yeast infection. that would make a grown-man cry too.

I have a "cooling sheet" that has a leak-proof lining on top of the couch and chair just for safety.
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I would question if her sitting in one position is causing irritation to one particular place. Is she able to describe where it bothers her?

I have experienced irritation with a pad before, but, I have extra sensitive skin. Maybe, your mom does too. I agree that I'd keep trying new products, but, also try giving her a rest from the diaper for at least a couple of hours per day, a couple of times per week. Even if means using some inexpensive cloth panties with a protection pad underneath. Sometimes, the down time from the pad really heals the sore spot pretty quickly. I'd try to find the softest diaper possible. I'm afraid, I don't know much about the brands though.
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There are inconvenience
Products available on-line
That are not sold in stores, such as disposables delivered.com

Perhaps the reason she is compllaing now and didn't
Before is that she has regained her ability to express her discomfort
As she slowly recovers from a stroke;
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We went through a similar issue. My Grandmother HATED everything we tried. We finally switched to Always Discreet, and she says they're so soft that you can't even tell they're a diaper. They just feel like regular cotton underwear.



Something you might want to do, is also add a little baby powder in it, and on her inner thighs. It will help absorb any extra moister, and help keep them from rubbing and causing a rash.
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Has she said what, exactly, is uncomfortable? If they are chafing around the legs you can snip the elastic to give a little more room there and relieve sore spots, they will be more prone to leaking though.

Has anyone checked for rash or yeast infections? That could be a discomfort that she attributes to the diapers but can be relieved with treatment.

It could just be the constant contact with the bleached materials that they are made from, I know back before menopause I sometimes found menstrual pads irritating, but thankfully only needed those a few days a month. Constant exposure would mean never ending irritation :(

I've joked with my mom that we used to put the babies bare butts outside for fresh air ;) ... could your mom go a few hours or even overnight with just absorbent pads beneath her?
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