Paper trail is her checkbook. Her name is not on our property,nwe did not sell her the land she is on. Did she technically gift us this money? Where do we stand legally? I have 3 other siblings. She’s continued to receive disbursements from IRA at her request and now hasn’t enough money for an emergency. No long term health care, no savings, etc. she continues to buy whatever she wants for herself only. The bulk of her money was put into the granny flat for her to live in. Myself and siblings are concerned and it’s not fair all the way around which my mom doesn’t seem to care about as long as she gets what she wants. She was supposed to pay back, to herself, the equity and any money she took for the build with her monthly income but hasn’t. She lives rent free like a Queen with no regard to what she’s leaving behind, a mess for me. The bulk of any money she had was to be divided equally between 4 of us kids, I am recusing myself from her trust however now we will all be lucky if we don’t have to pay out of pocket for a long term health issue and when the money is gone and/or her monthly income doesn’t cover expenses then what? I have to sell my house or?. Nothing is in writing. I am afraid I’d have to sell my house just to be fair...?
Her attitude is it’s her money and she can do whatever she wants with it and it’s nobody’s business. I’m probably babbling at this point, It’s just so much to process.
You AGREED to this deal and what you get in return is the granny flat after she passes. Correct? Sadly you will find that you got the bad end of the deal with this.
Your siblings, who are upset that the tiny inheritance will only go to you in the form of a granny flat, which you will no doubt EARN over the next few months or years, are they offering to split up the care giving 4 ways? Or are they happy with you doing it all for nothing, but still want their share of the inheritance?
If my parents made that sort of arrangement with either of my sisters, I'd actually be OK with it.
You really need to see an elder law attorney. I offer a couple of suggestions for possible solutions, but you need to run these by an attorney.
First, lease your mother land to locate "her" granny pod with a clause that when she no longer lives in the granny pad it must be removed from your property within a reasonable time frame, maybe one year. The granny pad will become part of Mom's estate and can be sold independently of your land with the funds being claimed by Medicaid Recovery or disbursed to her heirs. This would have been better executed before construction started, particularly to aid in constructing a pod that would easy to move. I think the lease would still be legal even if executed after the fact, the attorney can confirm.
Second, if your property is large enough or if there is an available and appropriate property nearby then plan on moving the granny pod off your property or to one side of your property (where you can cut a lot off with the least damage to your house) at some future date. Make a deed to the property and the granny pod in your mother's name. Even site built homes can be moved, distance largely depends on the size of the home. Steel I beams are placed under the structural beams of the house and used to lift the home off the foundation. The width of the roads and distance between existing structures then becomes the big problem. RVs are restricted to 8' so they can travel on any road. Traditional mobile and sectional homes are restricted to no more than 16' in any one section and can only travel on certain roads. If there are bridges around, the underpass height may become a limitation or the carrying capacity of the bridge.
Other option is to hope she doesn't need Medicaid for at least 5 years and/or you and your siblings can fund her care through the penalty period. Unfortunately with dementia patients there seems to be a period where our seniors start making bad decisions but are still legally competent, leaving us just watching the train wreck approach and it seems like your mother is in "the zone" now.
"mom sold her home, took equity and funds from an IRA to build a 'granny flat' for herself on our land in exchange for us caregiving. legal?"
How would you interpret "on our land"? Improvements? "Legal"? I interpret that "legal?" to be an inquiry as to whether or not construction of the granny flat is legal.
If consent is inferred, why would the OP ask if Mom's action is legal?
OP writes:
" Her name is not on our property, we did not sell her the land she is on. "
How would you interpret that? The mother is obviously not a feeholder, so she's either adding to the house or building on the land. I saw no inference of consent to build, or to add any improvements to a house, which would require a building permit issued to the fee holders.
I'm not following your rationale at all. Could you elaborate?
i don’t think she’s asking about the legalities in the way you are thinking she is. I think Medicaid may be a piece of the puzzle that she failed to mention.
If I saw bulldozers on my property, I'd raise hell and have the police on site to stop the action immediately.
I can't understand how this could happen; the city/township at a minimum would issue building permits, and more than likely would require proof of ownership or right to build.
Is the flat insured? An agent would require similar information on ownership.
Am I missing something?
Could you subdivide sell the property with the flat to get mom's investment back?
Your profile says your mom has dementia, about you says you are caring for healthy mom? I am confused.