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Does it really matter if she knows who you are? My mom is in late stage ALZ and I'm not sure she knows who I am either. But I find that it really doesn't matter in our case. I just meet her where she is. She knows I'm someone who helps take care of her and spends time with her. In our situation - and all are different - it doesn't matter to her who I am. It may matter to me that she doesn't know her own daughter, but truly, that's the least of my worries. My focus is more on her being comfortable, content and well-cared for. If you can't sing to her all the time to be sure she knows who you are, maybe just relax into the situation and don't frustrate yourself. Just let her see that regardless of who you are, you love her and are someone who can help her. All the best to you.
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Sing to her. Play her favorite music. Melodies are deeply embedded in memory and calm the ravaged soul.
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Dad has only one name in his head . . . my brothers. It used to bother me when he calls me by brothers name. I have tried many times to get him to remember my name and getting quite frustrated, until I realized it just does not matter. He wont get better and I am punishing myself in trying to correct him. I care for him in my home and he knows he is getting all he needs and wants. He knows he is loved.
A name is just a name, insignificant in the big picture.
It gives me relief to let this go. He is unaware of any of this.
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keep singing, I DO IT ALL THE TIME.
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Keep singing! It's great way to communicate...
Play music in the house -- oldies....:)
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If you're tired of signing....record your voice and play the recording for her. Good Luck. We all could use that. You must have a lovely voice.
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My cousin's wife (in the last stage of ALZ) could really only communicate through singing. It was the last time I saw her (a few years before she passed on)... but, this was actually a good memory for me, since she seemed happy at our family reunion... She was relatively young... Her husband was an angel for sticking it out with her... So, just enjoy her presence... At least it's on a happy note... Maybe you can even purchase an electric keyboard or some other simple instrument for her to 'play' with... Anything helps... It's ALZ... And, be kind to yourself... God Bless you both...
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All answers above! Meet her where she is. Play music - it calms the soul and reaches places just words can't go (ask anyone whose participated in a drum circle!) and by all means....please sing to her. I am sure it makes her heart happy and proud to hear you.
I come here to this site as one who recently lost my mother and I will tell you from this perspective - do everything you can to make her happy for as long as it is not hurting you it is worth it. If you don't you will regret that you didn't do those simple things for her. And, sing for yourself too. Always. :)
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Keep on singing. It gives them more memories. My husband loves to sing and he remembers the words of old songs. It is the one great part of Alzheimers. They all love old music. Take advantage. If you are tired of singing, play music for her.....the kind she likes.
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Music is good for the soul. I agree with everyone. I have Alz and I believe I am in the 3rd category. Thanks to whoever provided that nice link to find out where you are. I have read other articles, but this was the finest by far. I printed it out so I could read it in the future.
Anyway to get back to the music. I play music all the time while siting at my computer. Sometimes the radio, and sometimes CD's. I am trying to find a CD player and radio combo for my bedroom. I have always loved music, especially spiritual music. It calms the soul. I have in my instructions that my family should be sure that I get to listen to music wherever I am.

Thanks to everyone.
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