We moved my mother into a senior apt complex that provides home health care thru a contracted company. Mom will not go to dinner, she won't bath, and she is throwing a fit because we have taken her cigarettes away. How can I make her compliant? She has always been pretty awful to tell the truth. Maybe assisted living is the only way to go

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Yikes! Losing one's familiar home and nicotine at the same time would be rough on anybody, especially someone who's used to having their own way.

Can she manage a nicotine patch or other aid to ease withdrawal from the addiction? Please speak with her doctor about that and possible other medications to help her through this difficult transition.

And you might also consider counseling to support her in accepting the reality of whatever makes it necessary for her to be going through this. Blessings to all.
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I think the key is what you already said, that she's 'always been pretty awful' so therein lies the problem. How DO you get that old dog to do new tricks when that dog hasn't had to do anything except what it wanted to do? I don't know. You know your mom best, so figure out if threatening, cajoling, begging, reasoning or bribing works best and do it. Sometimes having a stranger tell a person like your mom what to do works better than having family do it. Good luck.
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