I've been patient for her to do it, but it's not happening. so frustrating. I've offered to assist her if needed, even assuring her of privacy, nothing is working. There's bench in the shower for her to sit on, and adjustable shower head she can hold. She assures me she's taking showers, but she's not. Her skin is dry and very scaly, her hair lies flat and matted. Is she resisting on purpose, just to assert herself?
The frustration is tremendous!! I feel that as her daughter, making huge sacrifices to enable her to live in her own house, she would at least hold up her end of the "bargain" (we are a team working together day to day). Am I asking for too much, is she truly not able to take a shower, or just resisting it to assert herself? She has mild dementia (memory and cognitive issues) but is capable of living by herself for a few days at a time. She dresses herself, can fix simple meals, takes many naps.
I have raised two daughters, now grown with their own children, and never felt the level of frustration I am experiencing now. I have no authority to take my mother into the shower, or give her a consequence if she doesn't. She simply doesn't understand (or is faking)...at my wit's end about this. I know to an outsider it seems like a silly issue, to shower or not to shower. Maybe I just need to remove myself from her for a few days and she will come to realize how important it is to me. But not counting on it.