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Mother has had Dementia for about five years now and has always let me put in her eye drops. She now refuses, because she no longer knows who I am. She thinks I am the hired help. If she does not take her drops to control the pressure in her eye, she could have a stroke and go blind in her eye, which is the only good eye she has left. She has already had a stroke in her other eye and lost sight in that eye. Has anyone had to deal with this? Help, I am so tired of fighting with her.....

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If she thought you were the hired specialist eye nurse rather than the hired help, might that reassure her? I'm just wondering if you can get your hands on an official-looking tunic or something, adopt a brisk professional manner, and see if that approach helps. You could hang the "uniform" out of sight somewhere and only wear it when it's eye drop time.

I'm not suggesting you actually impersonate a registered nurse, mind; just be yourself, but with a different, more authoritative style.
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Reply to Countrymouse
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GraceNBCC Sep 8, 2019
You read my mind! Also instruct her to look to the side away from you and put drops in away from her pupil...line of sight. Chilling the drops may help lessen the sting.
Definately puck up a scrubs top!
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Is there something that she really, really likes? Some special snack or chocolate? Sometimes, like dealing with a child, bribery works.
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Reply to DollyMe
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Have you asked her doctor for some antianxiety meds?

Not to compare, but when I needed to put antibiotic ointment in my dachshund's eyes, that was the only thing that helped.
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Reply to BarbBrooklyn
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What does her eye doctor say about the need for the drops? Has she been checked lately? I know that pressures can fluctuate and sometimes drops can be discontinued or frequency reduced. Mom eye doctor recommended a daily baby aspirin to ward off another stroke. Maybe you could ask the doctor about that, in case all else fails. Does she give you a reason for resisting? Do they sting? Maybe there’s an alternative. My Mom also had optic nerve stroke in her “good” eye which left her blind for the last year of her life. It exacerbated her confusion so much, I would try anything to avoid it. If she doesn’t recognize you already, would it be possible to tell her a fib like you’re her nurse or eye doctor and are there to give her the drops? Sometimes elderly people are more likely to accept a doctor treatments.
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Reply to rocketjcat
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Thank you everyone for the suggestions, which I will try. I have been on this site for over a year (thank God I found it) and it has helped me tremendously with mother and keeping my sanity. Blessings to all....
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Reply to Mom1934
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I had a similar problem with a nebulizer. I ended up using bribery with sugar free jello. Is it possible to do something similiar?
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Reply to tacy022
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My Moms Glaucoma wasn’t as bad but she did need drops daily. The Drs told me to try and if she refused try again later. If she didn’t let me that day just keep patiently trying. Please don’t stress yourself out over it like I did at first because it didn’t add quality or quantity to her life.
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Reply to Eyeopener
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My Mom also has glaucoma and takes drops. It was so difficult getting the drops in that now I give them before she gets out of bed. The eye doc said to put in inside corner of eyes and once she blinks the drops go in. Her pressures have been good for over a year using this method. Maybe you can try. Good luck.
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Reply to Sweetstuff
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Wow, I almost forgot! Both Mom and DH had a procedure where the glaucoma doctor shoots tiny laser holes in the eye. It was done in the office and only took a few minutes and they said it was painless. It stabilized their glaucoma and they both were able to discontinue the drops! Ask her doctor about that. It’s a specialized procedure but probably getting more common.
Selective Laser Trabeculoplasty, or SLT
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cwillie Sep 11, 2019
Sister had this done right in the doctor's office. She still needs the drops though.
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My patient also has glaucoma and needs eye drops once a day in each eye. We usually do it in the morning. Because my patient usually will not allow me to put the drops in the eyes, I give him the refrigerated bottle and he squeezes the drop(s) in each eye. Although he does it sloppy it works.
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