1st time posting I'm 25 she's 60 she didn't take too good care of herself never really managed her diabetes good and now it's really biting her in the ass. She had a stroke when I was like 8/9 or something but she came back from that. I don't know what to do with my mom anymore, I use to live with her in a 2 bedroom apt but that had stairs and her constantly going up stairs wasn't good.Opportunity came to move to singles in the apt complex high rise so we did it about 3 months ago. Not gonna lie I was a little happy over it too, I dint want to be one of those kids who lives with there parents for ever, but it's also level ground for her.
I know her health is declining eventually her kidneys are going to go, but she not at the point where she need dialysis yet, i know the diabetes is getting her eyes too. Recently I had to go the emergency with her b/c she was hurting find out that she's has urinary tract infection again. I know for the past few days she's hasn't been eating much she'll eat half her food and is constantly taking little naps in the day. The other thing is she's got IBS and whole bunch of food sets it's off so what her gastro doc said after she went to get an colonscopy was to avoid raw fruit/veggies (healthy food) and eat more pasta/white bread which is bad for her diabetes. I was with her most of the afternoon today and was trying to get her to eat/drink but she kept snapping at me when ever i suggested she eat just another bite or take another sip,I get it was kinda treating her like a kid, but I'm under the assumption she needs to eat more. Since that same gastor doc said she lost weight recently. I'm trying to get her to drink gatorade/powerade.
Sry if I seem all over the place i'm just frustrated and feeling somewhat guilty too. The other thing is we she says she doesn't want me to get a key to her apt. We have to go to the bank and get a letter notarized saying yes she gives me permission before the apt complex will give me a key. The things she has balance issues I recently bought her a new walker which is an improvement over the dinosaur she was gives. I've though of just taking it to walmart and seeing if they would do it but it's one of those do no duplicate. engraved.
I feel like i've got to constantly check up on her like everyday after work I spend about an hr with her. Doing her laundry, taking out her trash and helping her with her rent/bills. I know she did a lot for me growing up and what not, but i'm felling worried/upset at the same time. I don't mind doing it. But it's just that she keeps trying do stuff like she use to like cook full meals for me. It's nice but she doesn't need too, I constantly tell her that. Her other sisters are generally healthy, but i don't want to ask them to help more since I know she would hate that and they would probably say I shouldn't have moved out that I should have stayed.
Should I look into assisted living//nursing home or home aides should i call her primary doc and get her opinion?