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my mother is independent, she drives, we perfer local, but can't tell her what to do. she drives 3 hr.s away.at times to visit her sisters, & not safe.. This is my problem this summer my 85 yr. old mother has been going to beach, were she met this 50 yr. old male. she spends every day with him. I don't think he has a job especially if hes with her all day, and they talk on phone @ night. She likes talking like a big business tycoon/ buying land/houses..(she lives with me 30 yrs, owns nothing) She thinks nothing is wrong wiht it. He has 2 houses he wants to sell I just found out, and he took her to one of his houses for her to buy.. we asked what his last name is no answer. I asked her what does a 50 yr. old want with an 85 yr. old woman she just laughed and went to her room... My fear is that he is going to try and swindle her money that she worked so hard for and enjoy herself..

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thank you so much for your quick response.. she is OK to drive local. so taking her liccense is not an option... however she yells at Dr.s so they back off. She has always had a nasty disposition, and I think now she is bi-polar/dementia..
No one can talk to her now. she lives in my house and is mad at me for my comment.(what does he want with an 85 year old woman, and I did also say, there is no fool like and old fool)not a good move but said anyway. so its not going well..
It is hard being on this side of things, especially since she lives with me.. and everything is on my shoulders... as my brother lives in north jersey....
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Sounds like a real nightmare in the making. I would immediately talk to her doctor and explain your concerns about driving and the beach romance, etc. Make an appointment and hopefully the doctor will tell her she can no longer drive. The keys are taken away and the car sold..no if ands or buts.

If she is a danger on the road; not only is she putting herself at risk but other innocent people as well. That is a huge responsibility and could take very deep pockets after any kind of accident. Not to mention having to live with the consequences for the rest of your life.

Do you have a trusted friend, lawyer, minister than could easily talk with her and talk some sense into her?

I would offer to meet this new friend and get all the info you can. For sure a quick lunch at a place away from your home. We are talking about an 85 year old woman who is probably quite flattered by all his attention and not even aware of the danger she is in, both physically and financially.

Good luck!
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