My Mom lives with my sister and she does not allow me to see her. What rights do I have? - AgingCare.com

My Mom lives with my sister and she does not allow me to see her. What rights do I have?

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I am my Mom's POA. She took my mother out of my care some time ago. My mother was with the homecare attendant but that particular day the attendant left my mom unattended to go to grocery store. During that time, my sister removed my mother from the house that we lived at and did not inform me that she was going to do that. My mother was comfortable and there were no abuse issues at all. My sister just decided that she was going to take her to live with her. After finding out that she did infact take her, I did nothing. I let her keep my mother. However, I regret that now because since that time, she has not allowed me to come see her. We have other sister's and a brother that can see my mother and take her to their houses whenever they want, but she does not extend that same priviledge to me. She has no reason for not allowing me to see my mother. She told me that I will see her when she decides that I can. I need help because my mother is elderly and I don't want to see her after she is already dead.

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Just realized you are your mother's POA. As her agent, you have the responsibility in overseeing her care and in doing nothing your sister feels you neglected those responsibilites. As her POA you do have rights, but only in regards to what your mother's wishes are and in her best interests. If you want to involke your rights as her POA, be sure it is what your mother wants and it is in the best interest for her.
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As POA, you should be going to the doctor appointments. Find out when the next one is and meet her there. Visit her when she is at your siblings' house. That way you can see her without invading your sister's sense of privacy. It's a small step, but it can eventually open doors.
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Your sister is angry at you. She probably thinks you do not care, because in your own words you did nothing when your sister took her out a situation that your sister considered dangerous. Perhaps she did over react, but doing nothing instilled in your sister's mind that you don't care, even though that is not the case. Maybe telling your sister you want to see her and be part of her life before she passes. Hopefully your sister's empathy is stronger than her anger.
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