Mom lives alone and continues to fall and is not safe. She refuses to go to a nursing home. What can I do?

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My mother is 95 with lung cancer, she is very weak and shaky. Hardly eats and keeps falling. She lives alone and refuses to go to nursing home. Her resources are depleted and she is very angry, sad and just wants to die. But, she refuses to listen to hospice or nurses. She will NOT allow me to sell her condo, which is in disrepair. What can I do? She continues to fall and is not safe. She lives alone and refuses to leave or sell her condo. I am an only child and am on my own. Many debts are owed. She is in respite now but has to leave in 2 days? What can I do?

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Thank you for responding to my post. She is somewhat of clear mind, she knows she wants to be at home. However, will not admit she is too weak and needs 24/7 care. She wants that...but, there are no funds available for that type of care. There is no one my Mom will listen to....it is her way or no way. She is very stubborn. It is all very sad. There is also a lot of debt thousands and thousands that I would have to pay out of pocket since she refuses to sell her condo. I live on social security. Which I took at 62 so it isn't that much. Anyway, I feel so sad for her and hate seeing her so unhappy
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Snuffis, so sorry to read about your Mom's medical condition. Sometimes we need to step into their shoes to see the world as they see it. She is scared, and her condo is her cocoon, thus one reason why she won't move.

Sometimes we need to follow our parent's wishes, as long as the parent's mind is still clear. And sometimes we need to realize that our parent is in no condition to make any choices. That leaves us, the caregiver, in dire straits on what to do next.

My Mom was also in her 90's, refused to move to senior living. So I had to wait for the next medical emergency, thus every time the phone rang I went into sheer panic. My Dad was willing to move, but not without my Mom. Yep, it took an medical emergency, 911, a trip to the ER, then to rehab, then into long-term-care for my Mom.

Is there anyone that your Mom might listen to? Some parents won't listen to their grown children because we are still viewed as the kid, and what do we know :P
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