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Mom's in India with early dementia. She lives in an assisted living facility and I hired 2 caregivers for her, so someone's with her 24/7 - mostly.


There is 1 hour time lag between one caregiver leaving and the next one arriving. I usually call mom in this time to reassure her that the PM person is coming and shes not alone.


Yet, mom will say " I am so alone...the people who stepped out, they haven't come back and did not call me". We have this conversation daily. I try to figure out if mom was talking about the caregivers, but by this time mom has lost track of the conversation and says "at least you are talking to me now." She has no clue that I call her 3 times daily at least, more if needed.


Is mom going back to the time when dad used to return from work and me and my brother from school/college???? If so, what stage of dementia is this?


She is physically ok, climbs up stairs and goes for evening walks with the aide but doesn't remember any conversations.


Thank you!

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My Mom would talk about taking the "White Bus 🚌 to Heaven" and that on some days, no one got on or off the bus while on other days, 2 or 3 people got on or off the bus.  It took a few months, but I finally figured out that the "White Bus" was the Resident Dining Room and that the people who got off the "bus" were residents who either moved to another hall/unit or went home after completing their Rehabilitation. 😄
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Reply to DeeAnna
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Ok, thank you all:-)
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Reply to wren9184
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Oh my. The time we spent trying to 'connect the dots' until we realized there is no connection. I've done so much research on the stages and I'm not sure the stages even matter? I could be wrong about that, but dementia is what it is. And we just go with it. My niece takes care of my mom during the week, so I know what they are doing. On the go, she keeps her busy with activities. When I talk to my Mom? She says she's been sitting around all day because she doesn't have anyone to take her anywhere. And some of those days? I've met them out somewhere! She just doesn't remember.
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Reply to lynnm12
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Yes, cwillie is right. I believe we’ve told you before that there is no rhyme or reason to dementia. People who suffer from it, like my own mother, can live in a world of hallucinations and delusions. The stages of dementia vary greatly from one person to another. It would take neurological testing to possibly decipher what stage she’s in. Continue to reassure her that she will only be alone for a short while and then her lady will arrive. Then redirect. .
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Reply to Ahmijoy
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You are expecting there to be some kind of logic, albeit twisted logic, to what your mom says and thinks but often there is no logic at all to their thoughts and ideas. This could be a mishmash of past and present, fiction and current events, or things she has overheard happening to someone else, and trying to discover the source, especially from a distance, is only going to drive you crazy. You may as well just go along with her current reality, then reassure or redirect as needed.
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Reply to cwillie
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