My 84 year mom is very resistant to showing up for her Doctor appointments. What can I do? - AgingCare.com

My 84 year mom is very resistant to showing up for her Doctor appointments. What can I do?

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She suffers from Dementia and is very argumentative by nature. She is running out of refills of important meds and her doctor has stated that new prescriptions won't be ordered until she comes in for the appointment. I've tried to impress on her how important this is, but she just won't see reason. When theday of the appointment comes she just says she's too sick and can't go. How can I combat this? Please help,

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"She has dementia...she just won't see reason." You hit that nail on the head. Don't even try to reason with her, all she knows is she does not like to go see the doctor so let's just not do it; she does not grasp consequences. If you are fearful she could revoke POA and get into even more trouble, try to get guardianship as difficult as that might be, or at least get statements of incapacity that make it clearer she can't legitimately do that. If someone revokes a HIPAA release or medical POA but still lets you in the exam room you can still get information that way, and maybe you can get it back.

A few places have house call programs available, you may want to check with your local geriatric services (usually asociated with major medical centers) and see if that's an available option.
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You can offer to take her and when she claims being too sick to go, you take her anyway or threaten with, we either go to the dr or if you are too sick, we'll just go to the ER.

My mom is doing same. And I just make appt when I can be there to take her and then persuade with promise to go for a nice lunch afterwards. I too get all the resistance.

I also told her that the doctor charges for less than 24 hr cancellation of $200 and that gets her to go as well (it's a white lie, but helped me last time).

My mom is forever canceling the appt and I told drs office that she may not cancel any appts without them contacting me first. I once drove 6 hrs to take her and then found out she had cancelled and I was furious. They saw us, but it was 2 more days before I could get an appt. so lost work time for me. Unfortunately, later she revoked my HIPPA at the drs office so.

Another option is try to enlist a neighbor or friend she trusts to take her.

Deception is last resort, but you can always make the appt, tell her you are going to breakfast and do that and then swing by drs office and force her to honor appt.
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