What happens if the Assisted Living asks mom to leave because she is difficult? She doesn't have anywhere else to go? She didn't like living with my sister and her husband. I commute to work- gone from home for 15 hours.
MotherDear I know it must be a constant worry to you that your mom would lose her home. Since her attitude doesn’t sound new. I think I would speak to the staff and let them tell you how she is when you are not there just in case her unhappiness is reserved for her family. How long has she been in the ALF? Also be sure to check her out for a UTI as that could be causeing worse behavior. Have her meds checked by a geriatric psychiatrist. It would be wonderful if some adjustment could make her happier. Check her feet and make sure her nails are trimmed and her shoes fit her properly. Notice if she appears to have pain in any part of her body when you hug her. You might try asking she be given whichever pain reliever she can have, just to see if she responds. Does she sleep well? Do ask the ALF under what circumstances they have asked someone to leave. You might find that she’s not as disruptive as you think. I suppose you could start looking in order to have a back up facility if it would help your anxiety. Do you or your sister have POA? Does your mom have other health issues besides dementia? What stage is she? Be sure to take care of yourself. Ask her for a hug. Ask her for a smile. Be sure to give her one of your own.
Thank you Rovana and 97yroldmom for the responses. Great food for thought. Mom is easily confused. Sometimes she seems competent and then a bit later she is back to being unreasonable. She is angry she had to leave her place. Great ideas 97yroldmom. We will definitely speak with the staff and look into having her meds evaluated by a geriatric psychiatrist. She said she is sleeping better. She has fibromyalgia, her heart is weak. The doctor says she has dementia and Alzheimer's. It isn't severe because the ALF doesn't have memory care. We have POA. We will take care of ourselves, hug and smile with mom. Thank you so much we appreciate the support.
I know it must be a constant worry to you that your mom would lose her home.
Since her attitude doesn’t sound new. I think I would speak to the staff and let them tell you how she is when you are not there just in case her unhappiness is reserved for her family. How long has she been in the ALF?
Also be sure to check her out for a UTI as that could be causeing worse behavior. Have her meds checked by a geriatric psychiatrist. It would be wonderful if some adjustment could make her happier. Check her feet and make sure her nails are trimmed and her shoes fit her properly. Notice if she appears to have pain in any part of her body when you hug her. You might try asking she be given whichever pain reliever she can have, just to see if she responds. Does she sleep well?
Do ask the ALF under what circumstances they have asked someone to leave. You might find that she’s not as disruptive as you think.
I suppose you could start looking in order to have a back up facility if it would help your anxiety.
Do you or your sister have POA? Does your mom have other health issues besides dementia?
What stage is she?
Be sure to take care of yourself. Ask her for a hug. Ask her for a smile. Be sure to give her one of your own.
Mom is easily confused. Sometimes she seems competent and then a bit later she is back to being unreasonable. She is angry she had to leave her place. Great ideas 97yroldmom. We will definitely speak with the staff and look into having her meds evaluated by a geriatric psychiatrist. She said she is sleeping better. She has fibromyalgia, her heart is weak. The doctor says she has dementia and Alzheimer's. It isn't severe because the ALF doesn't have memory care. We have POA. We will take care of ourselves, hug and smile with mom. Thank you so much we appreciate the support.