Mom is fixated on moving/not moving her bowels. Any advice?

I am at wit's end with her. She has never been active and has chronic arthritis pain, so she's not going to get up and move around to stimulate her bowels. She's been to the hospital a couple of times with pain, but they never found anything conclusive and it eventually resolved itself. However, now that she is on narcotic pain meds, coupled with the fact that she refuses to eat much of anything besides peanut butter and crackers and ice cream, she's having a terrible time getting some action. She has had prescriptions for chronic constipation, but they tore her up terribly with cramping. When she does finally go, it just comes out a little at a time and not all at once, so she is, again, in the bathroom all day. Her PC Dr. has suggested that she take fiber, softener and senna daily, but she just will not maintain any kind of regularity in the doses…just takes whatever she feels like taking.

Beware about the fiber supplements, if she doesn't drink enough (and I mean A LOT) they will make her constipation worse. Try adding Miralax (polyethelene glycol), it is not habit forming and seems to help when stool softeners alone aren't getting the job done. And maybe it's time you took over dispensing her medications.

She will not let me take that over. She maintains that she is perfectly capable and "knows what she needs". What gets me is that I think it's a psychological issue, really. I hate to say that she does it for attention, but it honestly seems that way sometimes. She does have a counselor, but I don't go in with her and I'm sure she doesn't mention it there. I talked to her primary last time we went, but he just said if nothing else works to try an enema (and believe me she will not do that). I cannot make her take food that she doesn't want, and I cannot make her take medicine regularly if she refuses. She takes about 12 other medications too, and I nag her about the water all the time. I'm just tired of nagging. If she doesn't really want to get better…then again, I really think there are other issues here and she is using this. To what purpose I have no idea, and it pains me that she can be so self-destructive.