As I have said before Mom is in extreme pain all the time but she minimizes it for the doctors. Is this normal?

My Wife and I recently used a voice recorder to tape a sundowning episode with her mother. We played it back for the Hospice nurse so she could get a better idea of what she does when sundowning.

I would suggest that you take a calendar and ask her every day what her pain level is. Then bring that calendar to the doctor and explain that she minimizes her pain in the office. Ask firmly for a script for more pain meds so she can be kept comfortable in between visits.

Take my answer with a grain of salt, as I only have my own experiences to go by, but it could be a generational thing.

My grandfather was born in the 1920s and even though he had lung cancer, he would never tell the doctors that his pain was as bad as it was, because "in (his) day, people didn't complain so much." My mother and grandmother would always have to sit in the doctor's office with him and ask him to tell the truth, but he never would because it was so ingrained in him to downplay any discomfort.

We asked the pcp about hospice but he said not yet, maybe in 6 months. We asked him to have be considered housebound, she never leaves the house, only for doctors appointments and she is in agony. We are in the process, hopefully of getting a doctor to come to the house for everything once a month. That would be so great for mom not to have to go out. Thanks you guys.

My mother has severe arthritis and stenosis of her spine, so I know she hurts. I think she tells the doctor she has no pain for two reasons: first, she doesn't feel too bad at the moment when sitting down and, two, she wants to be seen as more healthy than she is. I guess it is pride that does this. We want to put on our best face in public.

Mine does that all the time. At home she is in agony. At the doctor's she says she has no pain. Drives me crazy.

Dementia patients do not process pain in a typical way.. is Hospice an option?

fligirl just a thought? i cant eat wheat and have been reading about the effects it can have on arthritis cutting out wheat may ease her pain? also green lipped mussle from NZ are supposed to help with this you can buy them i health food stores!
Did your mum have a few breaks when she was younger? mum broke her arm 3 times in her life but she only gets a bit of pain when its cold in winter even then not too bad but that could change!
At least your sister is coming up and can relieve a bit of stress on you!

I guess that was how to be manly in those days and lets face it men were more manly then they had to be!

Mom called at 6:15 am and said she was in agony, to come over right away. I asked if she took her pain pill at bedtime. She said she didn't need it then.
Her son gave her two choices, to take the pill or call 911. She took the pill and a half hour later she was fine. Knowing this, and noting that both your mom and ours was always "fine" at the doctors office, I think you are being played like a fiddle. If you had a nanny cam, I bet you would see her moving around free of pain when you are not there.