Mom in nursing home and all she does is complain. Any advice?

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After a recent hospital stay, my mom had to go to a nursing home for physical therapy. Afterward she would be returning to an assisted living facility which she is eager to do. From the first day, all she has done is complain. The food is too tough/tasteless/spicy/hot/cold. The nurses or aides don't come fast enough and when they do come around, finally, they are rude/act smart, leave too quickly (who wouldn't). You get the picture. Due to her low blood pressure, therapy hasn't progressed as quickly as she'd like. Either I or my husband visits each day even though she's about 30 minutes away. My dad is in a different NH only about 5 minutes and has an awesome
attitude, very upbeat. You can probably see why he didn't want to be in the same facility as her. My problem-I hate going to see her and when I do, we argue because I point out positives in her NH. I purposely try to be a Pollyanna about everything she hates. How can I be around her without wanting to stick a sock in her mouth? This could turn into a longer stay if she doesn't shape up and put a little more effort into her therapy.

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Thanks for all the good suggestions. This Sunday could be a real eye-opener for her. We're planning to bring both mom and dad to our house for a visit and she might not be strong enough.
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If it's too tough for you to hear her complain, plan your escape route. Tell her you stopped by the store, and the frozen food is thawing out, you need to get it in the freezer before it completely melts....
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Nancy is right. Don't go every day. She needs to adjust to the place. You can always call and talk with the caretaker and ask how she is doing. Visit on the weekends, or one day a week. They told me to stay away for awhile so mom could adjust to her new enviroment....
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Don't fuel her. Just nod and acknowledge her dissapointments. Tell her this is temporary, and say "I know, mom" Once you finish your phsical therapy and are stronger, then perhaps we can get you out sooner. "I understand, Mom". I am sorry it's not perfect, but it won't last forever. I'll see you tomorrow.Love You." You don't have to stay long, 5 minutes...Pop in, give her a favorite treat. Hug her and make sure you say I love you when you leave....
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Your moms attitude probably isn't a shocker to you right? Is she the kind of person who sees the negative in everything anyway, unlike your dad? If so, then you'll need to stop trying to sugar coat everything at the nursing home for her to swallow it better I'd wager. I'd start by telling her if she EVER hopes to get out of there she needs to buck up and do the work to make it happen. That's what you said originally that needs to happen, so if it were me I'd keep it real. And also I wouldn't go see her every day either. As long as she has you to vent to about what she thinks is wrong, she's not having to face it and buck the heck up. I'd keep that real too. Anyway, that's my two cents. Good luck. Complainers are a pain I know. ♥
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