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My mom and I are constantly arguing and it's very emotionally draining. She always initiates the fights and then blames me. I used to get more upset and yell back, but recently I've been very cool and collected. I'm wondering if she has bipolar disorder or something along the lines of this because she gets depressed and then happy and then screams at me. Sometimes this all occurs in one day. How can I diagnose this and how can I try to talk to her about it?

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Who is treating Mom for depression? If it is a mental health professional, I think I'd start with getting an appointment there. If it is her PCP that would be my second choice, but perhaps get a referral to a mental health doctor. PCPs can often treat depression successfully but it sounds like this may be more complex.

Mental health issues are not generally good do-it-yourself projects. As cdnreader points out there can be many causes for your mother's behavior. After you know what the cause is, read up about it. Come back here and ask who has dealt with it. The doctor and experienced caregivers here can help you figure out how to deal with this. But first you have to know what is going on.

Best wishes to you as you work through this.
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Dear justadaugther, Sorry to hear about what is happening. I know its hard and emotional time. I would take her to doctor. I guess it would be anything from being dehydration, not getting enough food and rest, over medication, urine infection, high blood sugars, its always hard to know. Try to rule out one thing at a time. I know its hard to be patient when you're on a emotional rollercoaster with an elder. Do what you can for your own mental help and try to get some respite if you can. Thinking of you. Please take care.
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She needs to go visit a geriatric psych doctor ,,you just never know what's going on ... please keep me posted please
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She's not taking her meds is she? Address that first. Keeping cool is a good idea. Going with her to the MD is also a good idea. Don't say anything, just listen and try not to speak for her.
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