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My MIL with dementia is in an assisted living community. She gets chronic UTIs for which she has been prescribed an intra-vaginal hormonal cream to be applied 2x per week - Tuesdays and Saturdays. With cueing and supervision she can apply this. We opened the medicine cabinet in her room today and found the pre-dispensed cream in a cup. It must have been brought to her this morning and she put it in the cabinet. (She had no idea what to do with it - again she has dementia!!) We asked her if she knew what this was for and she replied, "Yes I'm supposed to put cream on my gums after brushing my teeth." We took the cup to the charge aide who expressed surprise that the cream was just left. She promised to supervise the application today.


We are angry and upset and now can't help but wonder if this is the norm; if this and her other medications are being given to her unsupervised. We sent an email to the Director describing what we found and our concerns. We told her we feel someone is dropping the ball and asked that she call one of us on Monday to discuss.


I would love feed back on your thoughts and experiences.


Thank you

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I'll say this, and this is MY experience only, but not all AL's are created equal. I had my father in two, and just made the decision to pull him out for several reasons:

1- His level of care EXCEEDED the AL's capabilities. AL's are businesses and will often SAY that they can handle a resident with advanced needs (at a hefty price), but that wasn't my experience. They charge Al-a-carte for numerous services and your LO may or may not get that care they need.

I think AL may be for those that are still relatively mobile, with little cognitive issues, and able to still socialize but need a little help with the day-to-day (med reminders / meals/ etc.). If your LO needs more than that, you may need a higher level of care

2-Price to value ratio just wasn't there. Had I not constantly "popped up" at random times to check up on Dad, I think lots of balls would have been dropped. I found my stress level to be higher because I felt like I constantly had to monitor the AL staff which defeated the purpose of placing him in AL. I had NO peace of mind.

3- Too many patients per Caregiver. There is NO WAY your LO can get adequate care if they have advanced needs and the staff has a high patient ratio. It's not humanly possible...

As I said, there may be some good AL's out there, but I had to finally break down and realize that Dad was "too sick" to be in one and made other arrangements.

STAY ON THEM!!! SHOW UP RANDOMLY!!!! They may hate to see you coming, but the AL will at least know that someone cares.

BTW... I opened an investigation on the AL from which I just removed Dad.

Best of luck to you...
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Reply to anonymous262233
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Hello...DEFFINETLY they aren't doing their job according to the PLAN OF CARE.Who knows what else it's happening in that place.
I would of understand if patient refuses...
If that was the case they should document it and report to everyone involved in her care thru what is permitted by the caretaker or health care proxy.
I have a friend how has many health problems.Due to one of them Traumatic Brain injury and major depressive desorders.We knew INMEDIATEDLY when they did not give to him...His all self was completely out of control.I found out when i said...I NEED TO SEE HIM...they did not allowed me to go inside the Mens Shelter.So I got an order from his NEUROLOGICAL DR.The supervisor still did not let me in...I called the dr.and his secretary spoke to the supervisor and she told her that if she do not allowed
Me to get his pill boxes they will send the police.SO THEY let me in...and as we suspected MANY DAYS ON DIFFERENT DAYS no one expressed any concerns...Then when the pills where refilled.I took charge...No more out of my sight.I pick them up from the pharmacy ...pre poured and every morning on my way to work i meet him in front of the shelter and give meds...if i couldn't do it I will send a responsable person.That happened 2012...Now je has his own place since 2013 and im the one in charge of all is health issues...with others that are RESPONSABLE...we all keep an eye for our LOVEONES...please be on top of it...ask responsable people for asaistance.ALL IS going to be ok.Thanks so much for your love and good care.I know you and others will be rewarded...amen
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Reply to Sorgalim
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She is in assisted living? Is she paying an additional fee for medication management? Or is she in memory care? If MC she should not have any medications available to her. If she is in assisted living she needs memory care or medication management.
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Reply to gladimhere
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Thank you for taking the time to respond and for your validation. I really needed it!
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Reply to Sanibel01
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Thank you for taking the time to respond and for your validation. I really needed it!
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Reply to Sanibel01
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Contacting the Director is the right thing to do. Remember that something has obviously gone wrong, but the Director didn't do it. Try to be concerned but not angry when you deal with the phone call from her. Ask her how she can sort out the situation, before you get as far as losing your cool. Good luck!
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Reply to MargaretMcKen
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This should not have happened. With dementia, most everything has to be supervised. They can be a danger to themselves unwittingly. I have to watch every time my Mother brushes her teeth, eats her meals, uses the bathroom, etc. It's the responsibility of the the caregivers, because your LO is no longer able to reason for herself! I feel you did the appropriate thing in contacting the Director. He/she should be aware of such slights, as they could have serious consequences. A conscientious supervisor/director would want to know - to insure the best of care for their patients. Hope it all works out for you.
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Reply to dlpandjep
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The one thing that kills me EVERY TIME about SNFs, rehabs, acute care centers, assisted living facilities, etc is the people that supposedly have knowledgeable backgrounds or titles or specialized training are usually the ones with ABSOLUTLEY no common sense! As my grandmother would say....”book smarts but no street smarts”.
It is nauseating to think of what goes on undetected. We are totally at the mercy of others because we depend on their “expertise” (whatever that is)
I am so sorry you had to endure the emotional tidal wave. And I am horrified to think of the other residents that may be misusing medication. I wonder if the result will be they will state it is not in their “realm” to ensure the medication is taken properly or if at all, which burns my butt even more because it will be tossed back into your lap to ensure your LO is in an adequate memory care facility. It may be time to do so. Sheesh...
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Reply to Longhaul
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