My Mom has become extremely demanding, her mood is getting increasingly worse. Any advice? - AgingCare.com

My Mom has become extremely demanding, her mood is getting increasingly worse. Any advice?

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She is chronically ill and refuses mental health services. Makes demands like "I need a towel", but does not say where she needs it. If I ask why she needs it she does not say why, she will say I am dumb and should figure it out. She has been very ill and needs some help but her doctors have told her to do more for herself but she is perfectly content to have me wait on her. Family members have suggested mental health counseling as well as medical but she becomes very angry when that is mentioned. My sistersand I have got her teasing my dog then the dog snaps at her. She then tells everyone she is afraid of the dog and I am cruel because I will not get rid of him. I have told her it is her fault the dog snapped at her and why should pay the price for what she did?. I understand my mom needs help and I want to help her, but she is making NO effort to do anything. I have suggested she do things like throw her trash away or clean out her pockets before she puts out her laundry but she won't do it. What can be done?

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You haven't filled in your profile, so we don't know what your mother's impairments are. Could she live alone? Can you be gone for long periods of time, or does she need frequent care?

It is her house, her rules. Apparently she thinks that in exchange for letting you live there rent-free she gets to boss you around.

I think some mental health evaluation would be good for your mother. And I also think it would be good for you to see a therapist. Waiting for disability decisions and living with a demanding mother for four years has got to have taken its toll on you. Getting a little support for coping with your situation is something you deserve!
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I have two sisters and a brother. They don't live with her and don't need her for their survival. She is nice to them because they can leave and refuse to have anything to do with her. I live with her because I need to. I have no income and I am over 50 and trying to get disability. I have had three doctors declare me disabled but Social Security has been dragging it out for four years. My mom says she appreciates me but treats me terribly. I cannot live with other family for along list of reasons and I don't want to give my dog up because that is exactly what my mom wants plus he is like my child.
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Move her to Assisted Living. She obviously resents your care. Funny how they can abuse the people closest to them, then smile pretty for the aides and nurses. We love our parents and watch over them, but the line in the sand is the verbal and mental abuse. That is when they need to move.
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Mom needs to be seen by a psychiatrist. Not "would you like to go?". You just take her. It sounds as though she needs more caregiving than one person can give.
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