MIL is 91 and has lived in an AL for 2 years which has been a very difficult transition for her. She has some dementia and is unable to manage ADL's or any daily detail without assistance. She is no longer able to talk on the phone since she refuses to wear her hearing aids nor can she understand how the phone or the remote for the TV works. She does not cooperate and will stay in her nightgown all day, not attend meals (they bring them to her at an additional cost of 550$ month) and one of the biggest issues is her refusal to shower. Part of her contract allows her an assisted shower X2 weekly She will tell us she is showering herself, (impossible) however we can tell by her appearance and her ADL record kept in the nurse station she is not.
She is living in a large AL and we are beginning to think the staff turnover, coming and going of different staff, confusion on where to get mail etc is keeping her in her apartment since it is safe. She is aware her memory and ability to manage is declining and I am thinking she is isolating herself as a means of keeping the secret.
We are acutally looking at 3 new facilities that are smaller with an increase in 1:1 interaction.
She says she likes her apartment but complains about the staff constantly and only tolerates 2 of the regular staff.
How can we manage a move for her with the least amount of stress for all of us.
We are pretty sure a move would be in her best interest.
By the way, she goes to the doctor often enough and is under a doctors care for depression, dementia and hypertension. Aside from some aches and pains she is in great health.