The nursing home calls either myself or my sister when mom is acting up and expect us to drop what we are doing and run there.
When neither of us can go they ask "Well what do you want do with your mother"
Isn't their job to handle aggressive patients?
We are glad they keep us informed but I don't live that close, my sister does but she is going thru some serious stuff at home and can't go running every time.
Don't let them bully you into running over there all the time or moving her to another facility. Also you and sis can instruct and list those instances where you want to be contacted. For example, you only want to be contacted in a medical emergency. You and sis will take alternate weeks to be on call or be contacted.
If they can't handle or mom is not in good care, then consider moving her to another NH.
Ask around to other resident's family if they are encountering same hassles.
Hope This helps; but you deserve peace of mind and not being harrassed over small non emergency issues.
We meet with the case manger today, they are moving my mom to another NH with a lock down unit. She keeps trying to leave and threating to burn the place down so the firemen will get her out.
We believe she has sundown syndrome to. We use to blame her behavior on the UTI but now that that is cleared we know it is the dementia.