Mom is 77 and beginning to get forgetful and verbally abusive...also swearing. Anyone have insight? - AgingCare.com

Mom is 77 and beginning to get forgetful and verbally abusive...also swearing. Anyone have insight?

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She keeps saying over and over..its my business...its my business and no one elses". ..i cant even talk to my 2 brothers about her condition...im just wondering...anyone have this problem?

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Get her to a neurologist that specializes in dementia. They will give her some great tests that will dictate where she is at. Hopefully you get a good one.
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My mother is almost 86 - very forgetful, muddled and verbally aggressive - she's been like this for 10 years. She lives on her own, hates it but refuses to move. My sister and I have got to the stage where we dread spending time with her, all she does is be nasty about her friends and generally negative. She makes frequent visits to her gp and moans that they don't know what they're doing. I feel strongly tempted to give up listening to her complaints, I'm juggling 4 generations - she's the hardest work :(
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My brother is only 53. He has just started to get really angry for no reason. He would say some really abusive things. I would ask him about it and he would deny ever saying the verbally abusive things. The problem is that he said the things in e mails, so I could easily pull them up and show them to him. When I do he never responds to them. I worry about him. I think it would be best if I did not remind him and let it go. I do not think I am helping him this way by trying to remind him.
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PS...just to be clear ...i have talked to my brothers...but after talking with her..they see nothing wrong..but it will eventually get worse...im out of a job...cared for her sister for a year before she passed away from COPD 2 yrs ago..i was burned out an just getting back on my feet from that when this happened...thanks everyone for letting me share..
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thank you for your comments...im glad to know that im not alone...i live with her and see the signs and the forgetfulness..when she is talking to my brothers she is sane and calm and they dont believe me when i tell them things...she accuses me of taking her things, she has forgotten to turn off the stove...just walked off and left it on..she is a totally different person than she was ten yrs ago..i think she knows whats wrong but wont admit it...we fuss every day becasue she has to be right and im wrong...so glad i found this site...one more thing...my dad left yrs ago for a woman my age and i think that also had a lot to do with the present situation...love to all..
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This sounds like my situation about 2 yrs ago. Mom has vascular dementia and is not 89. She has since lost her speech. She attends a memory clinic and takes Risperidon which calms her. Sometimes too relaxed at night and wets the bed. I have also made peace with siblings (brothers) that are not interested in assisting and have moved on and have put things in place to give myself a break now and again. You need to care for your self!
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What does she mean " it's my business?" Sounds like something is bothering her. A memory from the past and it's confusing her. Suggest an appointment with a geriatric psychiatrist. Maybe even talk therapy at this point with a female psychologist--or a trusted girlfriend. You never know what she has experienced that no one knows about. When my Mother was still speaking she revealed some really weird stuff from her early years that I am positive she never revealed to anyone in her life. Purging of the brain. Talk to your brothers, too:) what's stopping you from that?!
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RonJess, why CAN'T you talk to your brothers about this? I don't understand why it HAS to be only you. That is a slippery slope you're on if you don't have both physical and mental backup from other family members.
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Is she living with you? If so, you must insist that she see a doctor and then, go from there. What are her plans for her long term care? Does she have health insurance?
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It sounds like Alzheimer's. My grandmother lives with us and has it and she not only can't remember anything, she is verbally and physically abusive. It isn't her fault and one day she'll go beyond that.
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