What do I do when my Mom fights against me to keep her from falling? - AgingCare.com

What do I do when my Mom fights against me to keep her from falling?

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If she is noncompliant with what will keep her safe, you may have to let the chips ( and her) fsll where they may. If she's got some dementia, this is more understandable. If it's a personality variable, it's stil understandable. In either case, you may have to wait for the big fall to happen and have someone take the decision out of her hands.
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What you do is accept that you can't make her use a walker or stop engaging in non compliant behavior. It's really hard to let that go and know that she'll probably fall and get hurt. But comes a point where there really is nothing you can do.
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I don't know how old your mother is, but my mother is 86 and has been resisting my help for the last 8 years... They know they need you but 'think' this resistance is going to keep their independence... Stubborn aren't they?... Now that my mother is 86, I instinctively know when to hold her... She likes me to hold her hand 'down' as if we're subtlety walking along... It's been hard on me from the start... but, I just do what I can... Oh yes... she actually cried when I told her she needed to get a 4-legged walker with a seat (recommended by her doctor) ... (instead of a 3-wheeled walker with no seat... which I hear isn't very unstable... especially for a taller person)... so it's become a fixture in her bedroom that she puts her papers on... I feel that she'll know when she 'really' needs to use it... (older people don't know all the trouble/time caregiver's go through to get these things to keep them safe)... You're definitely not alone...
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So if you go to assist her like holding her elbow or hand she fights you? She doesn't think she needs the assistance, am I reading that correctly? Then don't help her. If she's fussing with you and smacking you away she could lose her balance. If she starts to fall try to do a 'controlled fall' where you grab her and let her slide down your leg to the floor. Then tell her, "I told you so." ;-)
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Mom refused to use her walker and was grabbing onto furniture. I finally told her "If you fall, I will NOT pick you up. I will just step over you, get you a blanket and a pillow and you can lay right where you land." She was unimpressed. She finally got a cane, but tripped over it while trying to walk and use the cell phone. No texting and caning!!
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