Here's the scenario:
Mini-stroke in March 2013.
Moved in with me May 2013. Would not exercise, read (brain stimuli), cooperate with home rehab, manage own hygiene, learn about her diabetes.
Several falls in November 2013. After rehab, she came home and would not eat, take meds properly, or even dress. Within 2 days she had another mini-stroke.
Back to rehab in a nursing facility in December 2013. Unable to walk or have solid food.
By March 2014, they had her eating regular food, walking / exercising for 2 hours a day. She was released from rehab and set to go home mid March. They wanted her to continue walking, engage in an occasional social activity, and show that she could manage most hygiene tasks for a week. Since that time, there has been NO effort to comply, but she can give no reason.
I am not exaggerating when I say she complains non-stop and is never pleasant. We are seeing a therapist and psychiatrist and (you guess it!) she will not do any of the things they suggest to improve her mood and mental health. She has now regressed physically, has trouble walking and her feet are numb and swollen because she does nothing but sit.
I can't figure this out. I am the only child, only living relative and her POA. She insists that she wants to be cared for by ME and only me and wants to come home. Okay ... so why wouldn't she do the simple things asked of her to prepare her for returning to family life? I am disabled, but if she were doing basic things without the endless complaining, I could manage her care.
Is it unreasonable to request that she show she can do basic daily hygiene, minimal exercise and some brain stimulation each day? We do not want her to come home and, once again, do NOTHING. Remember, last time that happened she had another TIA within two days.
She will not consider Assisted Living and now tells everyone she can't care for herself at all. Doesn't she realize that she can't come home if she can't do ANYTHING for herself? We can get some home health help, but that doesn't help my physical / chronic pain issues when she falls or decides to refuse food or to get out of bed.
Thanks for reading this. This site saves my sanity just knowing that I am not alone with crazy parent problems. (-: