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She goes in and out of sanity which is the only way I can describe it. She has been taken to the bank 3 times and thinks that they are stealing money, says that the neighbors are chipping her concrete driveway and killing her bushes. I live with her so any time she can't find something, I stole it. Cat food, money, clothing, etc. She takes some meds, and quits others. I feel the longer we (there are 3 of us) allow this, the worse it is getting. Dr. has not been cooperative to an evaluation and has not guided us as how we can go about this. We need guidance sooner than later. She gets in bouts of aggression where I just don't trust her. I work a full time job and come home to this. She is at home alone all day and does not want to participate in any senior activities. Please, please advise.

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You are at a really bad stage of dementia. All I can say is that it will get worse and start to be apparent to others, where now it is mostly you who is seeing the signs. When my mom was in this stage I had to "sneak" in a caregiver by telling her that cg was there to clean her house. Very quickly my mother caught onto my subterfuge but she also decided she actually needed help. I only had help come a few hours a day, but it really helped me to have someone to "be me" when I could't be there. POA is vital, stick to your guns and keep after her to name someone, eventually she will, if only to shut you up. If she doesn't have a will, talk to her attorney before you go to do will paperwork and ask him/ her to broach POA necessity with mom. They often times will listen to anyone in positions on authority, heaven forbid she take advise from you! My mom always takes anyone's advice other than me, but I have found that if I brought it up on different occasions, she would think it was her idea all along because she would forget where she heard it.
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Thant is a million dollar question with such an uncooperative doctor and her still considered a competent adult. I've not slept much in two nights. I hope others will have some ideas.However for right now, I can only offer you a link to advice on this site related to this. Good luck and keep in touch.

https://www.agingcare.com/search.aspx?searchterm=getting+stubborn+parent+to+doctor
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How do you go about making a stubborn



How do we go about getting her to go to another doctor when all she worries about is money? (she has more than enough). We keep hitting these brick walls. What you think should be an easy remedy is not.
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Sorry, there are 3 daughters. I am the one that lives with her. She is in control of her meds (like everything else). She is a control freak. She says I am trying to poison her or make her sick when I try to guide her with medication. She is mean and verbally abusive.
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Who is the third person in the house?

Can ya'll supervise your mother taking her meds regularly?
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Get the medications taken as prescribed. Skipping some and doubling in error can lead to the confusion you describe. Take the pill bottles away and have her use a seven day (7x4) pill box that only you fill.
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In her aggressiveness, has she ever caused you to feel that she was a danger to herself or others?
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Dr is a GP. She is dead set against changing doctors. How do you handle that?
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I would add to consider getting her to a geriatric psychiatrist. He/she can work with her to see if there are certain medications that will help... if you can get her to take them. Sometimes I don't know how we handle all the things that are thrown our way. We just do the best we can each day and try to find something that helps.
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What kind of doctor does she have? A standard Primary Care Physician? She needs another doctor since that one is not helping.

What meds has the doctor put her on? Does she have any additional financial resources that would help pay for her to have some care during the day while you are out working?

She needs a gerontologist who is a doctor that is focused on older people in general or a neurologist who can focus in on her dementia and paranoia.

Look up a neurologist for her online over the weekend and then on Monday call to make an appointment for her. Do this soon!
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