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My mom was diagnosed with severe aortic stenosis almost 2 years ago. Back then the Dr. told her she only had 6 months to live. She has qualified for Hospice but leads a very active life for an 89 year old. Today she got up, ate breakfast, made lunch and went with her friend to the Senior Center. About an hour later, the friend called and said mom was "acting weird". When I got there to pick her up, she didn't know how she got there, she forgot she uses a walker, and didn't know how old she was. At first she told me she wanted to stay and play. In the next breath she told me she felt funny and light. This went on for over an hour. The hospice nurse came and checked her. All her vitals are within her normal limits, but she still can't remember anything. She lives in my basement and I work over 30 hours a week. Last week she found out one of her friends had been put in a nursing home and she said "I don't want to go there, I don't want to go there (a nursing home). What do I do now?

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Get her checked for a stroke! Her vitals may be normal after a stroke, it takes bloodworm or MRI to determine it. I'm not sure what hospice policy is for treatment, but this abrupt change is not normal.
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Blood work, not worm.
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Ask the nurse if Mom can be tested for a uti.

See how this plays out over a few days.

Realize that while it isn't the typical pattern, sometimes dementia does appear very suddenly. It did for my husband and one other long-term member of my support group. Last we we had a new member who could name the day his wife started exhibiting clear and strong dementia symptoms.

Give it some time to see how this progresses. If it is dementia then your mother probably cannot be left alone while you work. One possible solution is a day health program, that would pick her up and bring her home. While you are working she can socialize in a safe environment.

If a nursing home becomes necessary try very hard to realize that it is Not Your Fault.
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08/24/16....MomMandI, please note that people who are your mother's age remember what nursing homes were like half century ago, big difference compared to today.

The newer Assisted Living complexes resemble hotels. My Dad [94] is in one and he really likes it, he said he feels so safe there, and loves all the attention the Staff gives him. He has his own bedroom and bath. For meals, he goes to the dining room on his floor where he eats with 2 other gentlemen who are close to his age. Dad said its like living in a college dorm :)
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