What do you give to an ailing Mom that can barely drink from a straw? - AgingCare.com

What do you give to an ailing Mom that can barely drink from a straw?

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Mom was neglected in a nursing home....neglected UTI resulted in some kidney damage. Not eating and barely will drink. Is there anything other than soup ? She has dementia also. I do have her home with me.

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I lost my mom a year ago tomorrow. A week before she passed away I tried to get her to take just a few sips but she looked at me and said "please don't make me". I assured her I wouldn't. I had already called hospice. That night was the last time my mom talked to me. She never regained consciousness, and a week later she was gone. My point is respect their wishes. I miss her, but I am so grateful that I did what she wanted me to do. Prior to that they did add thickeners to her juice. Funny thing was, even though she had dementia and couldn't remember a lot, she sure knew she didn't like that stuff in her juice. Hang in there, but hospice may be your lifesaver right now.
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Thank you, pipruby, I was just going to ask whether the problem was drawing up on a straw or swallowing. If sucking on the straw is a problem, the only answer is spoon feeding, so to speak. My mom could still suck up through a straw but would often start choking when she tried to swallow. She COULD swallow and congealed foods foods (such as puddings, custards, pureed baby food) but wasn't good with anything that was either very liquid or was the slightest bit chunky (EVEN something as thin as natural applesauce was no good). You can pretty easily control not giving chunky food but liquids can be a problem. There are several manufacturers that make thickeners that you can add to juice or water so that liquid doesn't choke the patient.
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When I cared for my mom last year..it was about this time last year she decided that she couldn't eat any more. I remember trying over and over again to get her to drink and every time I did she would gag. At what point should you keep trying?...no one knows. But I will say when she did it was more scary to see her choking and gagging. She was frightened as well. When the brain shuts down, they forget how to swallow. Please call her physician or Hospice to help. They are such a relief when it comes to this. They will make her comfortable and keep her medicated. I'm so sorry...I hope you have better days. God Bless.
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Make sure she is ABLE to swallow. Sometimes that is not possible, or partially so and the thickness of the liquid is important. The MD can check this.
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Laurie, please look into Hospice. They can come to your home to help you keep Mom comfortable.
I lost my mother six years ago to complications of kidney failure and dialysis dementia. My biggest regret is that I did not start Hopice care sooner.
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What is it you expect or want to happen? Do you have her DPOA? Is there a DNR? When she did not have dementia and was not impaired, did the two of you discuss what she wanted in this eventuality? How much heroic treatment to have even if the end result is now terminal?

The best thing to do is find an excellent Hospice and have them come in and do an evaluation for appropriateness. They will give you information that will help you decide which direction to go in.

It is a difficult thing to have the responsibility of literally holding someone's life in your hands. But it only FEELS that way. In reality, what you must remember is that they appointed you as their agent. This means you are supposed to direct and accomplish, on their behalf, what they themselves wanted had they been able to make the choice. knowing what they wanted and helping to fulfill their choices is one of the final showings of respect to you can give them.
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With dementia eventually she will lose interest in food. A feeding tube can keep her alive but at what cost? My mom had a advanced directive to which she instructed no life sustaining procedures. As hard as it was to watch she was ready and keeping her comfortable physically was all we could do. The Hospice can come in and help with that. I'm sorry Good luck and God Bless.
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Baby 'sippy' cup.
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Old style 'pots' with spouts that look like small teapots.
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I don't know about what foods would be good, but my mom has been sick lately and we used oral syringes to put fluids in her mouth. The pharmacist sent them for the meds but since she was barely awake and pretty much non-responsive I used them to get water, juice, and soup in her. I warmed up some tuna and scrambled an egg with cheese to get some protein in her without too much chewing necessary. She also had yogurt. We did the popsicle thing too. I microwaved them for just a few seconds and then used a spoon to get the bits in her mouth. I'm so sorry to hear that your mom was neglected and I am so glad that she has you to look out for her. I hope the new year will be better....
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