My 90 year old mother is using “she and we” instead of I. She will say “she doesn’t want to get up “ or whatever. Anyone experience this?

As long as your mom isn't agitated, frightened or upset about anything, just let all the statements go. That's my advice. My 94 y/o mother with dementia changes her perception of things all the time and as long as she's not upset, neither am I. Lately she's certain that her family members are still alive, though, and that saddens me because they're all deceased; she is the last man standing out of 10 family members in all. She's convinced they're 'ignoring' her, which isn't the case, of course, so it's tricky trying to explain reality to her w/o upsetting her.

I hate dementia with every ounce of my being. It strips our loved ones of their memories, and it takes them away from us entirely as we watch them fade away.

Wishing you the best of luck moving forward.
Helpful Answer (1)
Reply to lealonnie1

Don't sweat it. The queen does the same thing. ;-)
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Reply to MJ1929

In psychology, referring to self in the third person is called "Distancing".
I found this:
"Research shows that self-talk, when done in 3rd person, can be an effective method of emotional self-regulation which can reduce anxiety. Converting your anxious/negative thoughts into third-person sentences reduces its negativity. It provides the necessary psychological distance between the self and anxiety-inducing contexts. This also helps when you are thinking about negative events and ruminating anxiety-ridden thoughts. The psychological distance allows a person to reflect on themselves in a less emotional way, similar to how they would reflect on some other person. The self is often emotionally charged in moments of anxiety, so the distance helps in reducing the impact of those emotions. Psychological distance lowers the perceived intensity of emotions and makes them easier to manage."

In the movie The Never Ending Story, Morlah the ancient Tortoise on Shell Mountain states:
"W e d o n 't c a r e".
"We don't even care that we don't care".
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Reply to Sendhelp
Grandma1954 Apr 8, 2021
I LOVE that movie!!!
Its part of the Dementia. I told a story the other day about a client that had Dementia and living in her own home with family checking up on her daily. The front door was always left open for our Nurse. This one day Charlotte had locked the door. The Nurse identified herself but Charlotte would not unlock the door. She kept saying "Charlotte is not here she when shopping". I was able to track down a niece to get the door unlocked. Shortly after that Charlotte was placed in a NH. She thought she was in a hotel and the staff was so nice. The Nurse called it an episode. Can happen overnight.
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Reply to JoAnn29
lealonnie1 Apr 8, 2021
I believe my 94 y/o mother thinks she's living in a hotel too, but she's living in a Memory Care ALF for the past 2 years in June. She says she 'feels funny eating there' because it's 'not where she lives' but the 'staff is so nice'. Her perceptions change all the time. Lately, she's getting dressed to 'ride the bus to Brooklyn (from Colorado) to see her Papa (who died when she was 16)'. She calls me every evening to tell me she's 'not coming home' and 'will stay there tonight'. So I'm not sure what she's thinking, and it doesn't really matter as long as she's not agitated/scared.
No, but it seems like a pretty small thing to worry about.

They say people return to childhood as they age. My 3 yo grandson refers to himself by his first name or in the 3rd person.

Doubtful it's a worry at all. Actually, kind of funny. Like she's narrating what's going on around her.
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Reply to Midkid58

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