Would my Mom (95) who lives with mid-stage Alzheimer's disease benefit from either a low dose or mild anti-anxiety medication?

Babalou, I am laughing about the quivering pile of dread.

I sit with my mom now sometimes, and we a normal conversation, and I think: only a few pills are making this possible, only a few pills are standing between me and a phone call to the police to report that I stole her car. So, I am very grateful to those little pills.

I have read on this blog that some feel it is not right to give pills to change the mood of their loved one. I have only one thing to say to that: those people haven't walked in our shoes.

Before my mom started down the slippery slope of dementia, I had had NO IDEA what anxiety even was. Who had anxiety? We were all to busy to have anxiety.

Now, in retrospect, I realize that my mother was already having delusional paranoia a few years, maybe four or five (!), before she hit this slippery slope. Anxiety can eventually generate this paranoia. Before it gets that far, however, it can be exhausting for the patient and caregiver.

Eventually and predictably, I came into the cross-hairs, and became the target of the paranoia. To make a long story short, and as I have written elsewhere, the AL where my mom is now shipped her right straight off to a Senior Behavioral Clinic after she had only been at the AL for one week. They understood that, in their words, they "were not serving her" in that condition.

I cannot say enough about the Senior Behavioral Clinic. It is a place where the patients are put under the microscope and watched all day long for their reactions to the medications until, after about ten days, the correct "recipe" for a patient is determined. Our family doctor just did not have sufficient information to do this.

So, to come back to your question, Yes, meds might be a huge help. Not to "cure" the dementia but to alleviate the anxiety. Everyone is better off with a good night's sleep. Life might be much better for all of you. There is nothing lost with a visit to a geriatric doctor. Good luck!

I have to endorse what Salisbury says about antidepressant and anti-anxiety meds. They have changed mom from a quivering pile of dread into a relatively calm person. She still has dementia, but she no longer thinks that the IRS is coming to get her and that the facility is flooding, everyday.

Why not at least discuss the pros and cons with her doctor? A professional opinion wouldn't hurt anything!

This may not be a health risk for her. What about for you? The pattern of when we sleep and when we are awake is partly a matter of social convenience. Does she keep you up at night? Are you able to nap when she sleeps in the day?

If she mostly sleeps in the day then she is probably not getting much socialization or mental stimulation that might help her be less anxious.

My husband (LBD) took a drug to help him sleep through the night, and another one to avoid daytime sleepiness. This worked well for us. But each case is unique.

Talk to her doctor.

Alzheimer's usually calls for anti-cholinergics, if you are sure it is Alzheimer's and not some other form of dementia. Antihistamines often have anticholinergic activity, to which elderly patients are particularly sensitive. These include Benadryl (diphenhydramine) Dextromethorphan (cough syrups) and others. We have seen several positive reports with just Bendadryl.
Seizures? Sherry Anne, ask for a PRN for Ativan when you see seizures. Valium won't stop seizures, but Lamictal treats both seizures and mood swings. Allergy meds like Zyrtec and Claritin can exacerbate seizure activity.

Donna, doesn't it just irk you at what happens (or doesn't happen!) in hospitals these days? I am a retired RN and I can tell you that I am tempted to take all the usual meds with me, and just GIVE them, in order to avoid having to go through this kind of stuff where either staff won't listen and call the doctor, or the doctor won't respond appropriately and then, it's the patient who is suffering and the family member who has to watch it all and feel helpless. And if only the staff could understand how much easier THEIR shift would be if they WOULD listen to the family or the patient. When I worked as an RN, I listened to patients and families and tried to get the doctor to cooperate with what they wanted or needed OR come explain to them why their request was not good during a hospitalization. Old people who are nearing end of life should have as little upset as is possible for them to endure!

Again, I have to say--get thy loved one to a geriatric doctor.

Donna, my mom's short term memory is gone, too. Don't hate me for saying this but it has actually made my life easier. As recently as September or October 2014, if I went to NC to visit grandchildren, my mom was furious that I had left her and hardly spoke to me. Today, when I show up she has no idea when she saw me last, two hours, two days, two weeks, whatever, and is delighted.

Ahhhhhhhhhhh, much better.

Well, Joannes, thank God someone understands. The nurses in March had to walk by and HEAR my mom saying "I'm going to throw something through the window if they don't let me out of here!" things began to move along then. As is common, that was not my mom talking. As you said, people need to hear the caretaker and patient and try to meet their needs. Thanks for your comment.

My mom is in a memory care facility. She is the sweetest little woman on the planet ... until she becomes overwhelmed with anxiety. The "not knowing" is very hard on her. The geriatric physician who visits her suggested an anti-depressant. I told him that she is not depressed, and I suggested Xanax. I didn't want her on a medication full time if it wasn't necessary. He complied, and she gets a low-dose Xanax prn, but no more often than twice daily. It calms her, helps her to focus on a conversation with us, and she rests well. Our goal is for her to have peace, and it helps!

My mom was taking xanax for years. New doctor weaned her off and everybody I've talked to, doctors and social workers say xanax is an awful drug. She also was taking risperdone,--made her hallucinate, talk in her sleep all night, uts's also did that. New New doctor took her off that. We started her on health food store supplements--notably cranberry tabs, probiotic, and Phosphatidyl serine. Can't say enough about it--my mom is close to 89 and better than she has been in years. Doctor says he sees no dementia.