Mom and Dad treat my siblings differently than me when they come home for a visit. Any advice?

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My sister lives out of town and my brother lives out of the country. When they come home for a visit, mom gives them the "star" treatment just as she would a guest. When it is just my parents and me, they watch a lot of tv and I usually have to wait for a commercial to say something. I am in graduate school and they really don't ask much about it ( I am part time so I only have 2 classes.). I think it is not very fun around my house. (I am not the most fun person and I lead a quiet life which I prefer. ) so they probably "perk up" a bit when my siblings come home, especially my brother who has a 1 year old. I guess I can understand that but it feels awful. Anybody out there experience the same thing?

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I do understand how you feel. It truly is not fair to treat children differently no matter whether you see them all the time or they live far away and rarely visit; even with a grandchild. You should all feel special in the same way. I feel very strongly about this and have had experience with it.

When my sister would come visit from CA which is 3,000 miles away; she was considered the "glamour girl" and she even said those words to me. While I was the one who always cared for our parents and loved them unconditionally. I will leave my blessed father out of this as he was my best friend and always made me feel special not matter who was visiting.

While the novelty of a visit from a child who lives a distance away is uplifting; you should be made to feel special every day since you live with them. My mother was never interested when I was going to college and even commented "what are you doing that for" - so "I get it". Try not to let it get you down; they are aging and obviously getting set in their ways - this is not an excuse; just an observation. I have three daughters and they are the light of my life. All in their twenties and two living at home. I always make a point to make them all feel special; that is just me. I think I do especially not to perpetuate what I was exposed to with my own mother.

It's not intentional on their part; just and oversight is what it appears to be. Doesn't make it right; but I do agree with your plans to immerse yourself in your studies next time they visit. That is an important aspect of your life right now and it is a great opportunity to show it; and I give you praise; graduate school is no easy task. Wishing you much success!!!! Take care.
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Your parents are playing catch up with your siblings. You are there all the time so they don't have the same emotional contact with you. When you move away and come for a visit you will receive the same treatment they do.
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thank you both. JessieBelle, males were considered more important in my mother's family (she grew up with 2 sisters and ten brothers). But my sister gets star treatment too. Assandache7, if I took my own vacation I would absolutely never hear the end of it. However, I could do it on a smaller scale. For example, my brother is coming home right at the end of the semester. I have advised him of this and plan to assert myself for my studies rather than being "sucked in" to entertain him, wife and baby.
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Next time they come to visit I would make other plans and visit with friends or take my own vacation...
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I understand completely. It used to bother me more than it does now. A classic example of how I was treated different -- my brother and I were both living in TX. One year we both came home on the holidays. I came one day, he came the next. When I got here we had sandwiches for dinner. Then my mother told me she needed my help cooking the feast for my brother the next day. Men and boys are the important ones to my mother.
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