MIL age 97 in nursing home with very aggressive form of bone cancer. Hospice taking extremely wonderful care to manage her pain: and it was her desire to be out of pain or as she put it “ put to sleep”.
she has had severe pain, and they have continuously changed and increased her pain meds, and now has fentinol patch plus morphine.
but we notice increased confusion, sleeping much more, staying in bad now, not really eating. Also developed Covid and is quarantined.
my question is is this end stage of life or just the result of pain meds?
I was on this forum 4 months ago and lost my mother at that time. She was on hospice and I saw her breathing change and skin mottling as she neared death. However my husband and I are recovering from Covid ourselves and unable to visit her but we wonder if symptoms are result of meds or if she is in a last stage of life. We call her but she rarely can talk, but when she can , sounds so confused and really doesn’t know who we are. Hospice hasn’t told us a time frame but did say they would know more in a few weeks.
we have seen rapid deterioration in two weeks.
Your separation from her and your brain thoughts and anxiety may be clouded. I am so sorry that you have to be separated
My mother rapidly deteriorated and passed away within a one week period back in February after taking to her bed one day. She was socializing as usual in her memory care ALF, then felt tired, went to bed and fell into a semi comatose state and pretty much never woke up again. At first I thought it was due to the Ativan being increased, but she stayed the same even after it was decreased. She passed one week later, exactly. I was relieved it was quick and she didn't have to suffer anymore.
I know how tough this whole situation is. Sending you a hug and a prayer for peace. Also a quick recovery for you and DH.
I try to force myself to stop overthinking her circumstances as much as I can, tell her how much I love her every time I’m there, and appreciate every second with her.
She isn’t receiving any of the “end of life” meds, but is in bed all the time now.
I’m not sure you’ll be able to get much by way of time frames and I’m not sure either that any guesses at this stage of the game are anything more than guesses.
My sincere sympathy to you and your family. I understand only too well the situation you’re in.
The pain meds are for her comfort. Her sleeping is part of the transition. Her wanting to stay in bed is part of the transition. In the last two weeks of life anxiety stepped in, she closed her eyes not to open them again and then would not get out of bed.